METAL MEN 23 (1967)
by Robert Kanigher & Ross Andru
By my count Tina has already died 12 times so far, what’s one more?
Just in case you forgot last issue, this one handily begins with a quick recap:
Despite the fact that nothing about her makes any sense (even by Metal Men standards), I kind of like Sizzler.
Even though she’s making the team look useless by comparison.
Let me rephrase that.
She makes the team even more useless than usual.
Case in point:
Just in case you’re wondering: no, Sizzler’s power to turn humans into robots (and vice-versa) goes completely unexplained.
Okay I get it that robots don’t go to jail… but you KNOW Snakelocks used to be a human, so WTF!?
Despite inventing a seemingly all-powerful being like Sizzler, it’s obvious at this point that Snakelocks sucks as a villain.
Unfortunately he’s replaced by an even lamer one.
Is it just me or considering how he looks “the Lizard” should’ve been called “the Toad”?
Also the only reason he manages to kidnap one of the Metal Men is that Tina doesn’t put up a fight, hoping to make Doc Magnus jealous by playing the damsel in distress.
I have to admit that a robot writing a letter that begins with “I’ve been stolen” is legitimately funny and even somewhat clever.
The Lizard’s men ambush the rest of the Metal Men separately, but FOR ONCE the team is not an utter embarrassment!
Well… mostly.
Then Tina takes a bullet for Doc Magnus! This would make no sense normally (why is she hurt!?) but it makes even less sense THIS time since he’s currently a robot!!!
Well I’m glad we kept the suspense of her possibly being dead for LITERALLY TWO PANELS.
Sizzler turns both Doc and Snakelocks back into humans, so the first can continue to ignore Tina and the second can go to jail.
And that’s already over! Compared to the usual Metal Men issues, this one goes by very quickly since barely nothing happens.
I’ll let Sizzler explain the scores.
Metal Men significance: 0/10
Silver Age-ness: 106/10
Does it stand the test of time? 3/10
Couldn’t have said better myself.
Times Nameless has died: 4
Times Platinum has died: 13
Times Mercury has died: 15
Times Lead has died: 17
Times Gold has died: 17
Times Tin has died: 17
Times Iron has died: 17