Season 1, Episode 10: “Child’s play”
Written by Marty Isenberg
Directed by Ben Jones
Original release: February 24th 2007
Running time: 22 minutes
Air time: Saturday morning
This episode is the last light-hearted one from Season 1, and it was intended to be aired earlier in the season.
We begin with Superman being amazed at the future technology of a coffee machine.
First the muffins come alive, then a nearby building, then it literally rains cats and dogs…
…and after the credits, we learn that the culprit is this dorky-looking kid.
And he’s using magic to cause trouble, which of course doesn’t sit well with Brainiac 5.
This is Zyx (according to the credits, even though the subtitles call him Zix), and he will be the closest thing this episode has to a villain.
He’s voiced by prolific voice actress Lauren Tom, best known for voicing Amy Wong in Futurama.
Without knowing who he is or why he’s on Earth, Superman decides (against Brainiac 5’s opinion) to take him to Legion HQ.
Where Triplicate Girl is playing the most confusing-looking sci-fi chess game I’ve ever seen… how do you even play that thing?
Purple, I didn’t even think you were playing! How do you get 3 players on a game where the pieces have 2 colors???
Considering Superman brought him here, I have the distinct feeling he hasn’t met Mr. Mxyzptlk yet.
He takes down Saturn Girl by enlarging her earrings (despite the frame almost making it look like she joined Femforce), which confuses me… her earrings aren’t even attached to her ears, does she normally feel their weight?
When you force SATURN GIRL to become the sarcastic one, you know you’re in trouble.
Not that Brainiac 5 is any better at this…
…so we’re really lucky this is a Phantom Girl episode.
A quick call to Phantom Girl’s mother (who remember is President of the United Planets) confirms that yep, we’re dealing with Sorcerer’s World.
A very rare case of using a Legionnaire’s real name, something that this series doesn’t do often.
I see how you got yourself elected, Winema.
We’re at the 5 minute mark and nothing has happened yet, so the Legion gets busy capturing the pets from the Phantom Zone they first met in Episode 4 and that have just escaped from their cages.
Of course Zyx is behind their escape, but don’t worry: STILL nothing has happened.
It most definitely wasn’t, Zyx.
Aaaand now Zyx throws a temper tantrum: turning Lightning Lad into a mouse…
…Bouncing Boy into A LIVING NIGHTMARE…
It would be if you were any good at it, Zyx.
Phantom Girl takes charge, deciding she’s going to Sorcerer’s World to find someone who can deal with Zyx.
And she BARELY gets to the Legion Cruiser before his magic hits her.
We were previously told that the Sorcerer’s World severed all links to the United Planets centuries ago, and it turns out that Phantom Girl’s mother has more recent history with them.
This sets up Phantom Girl’s arc for this episode: finding a way to fix things with diplomacy when her mother couldn’t.
Yep, we’re at Sorcerer’s World alright.
We have FINALLY reached the good part of the episode: Phantom Girl navigating through the bureaucracy of Sorcerer’s World.
Bureaucracy that, in a montage, require things like boxing a giant rabbit…
…just to get in line.
This all feels very random… and it is… but there’s a genuinely great idea behind it.
The reason why this society is obsessed with bureaucracy and rules is that they need it to keep their magic powers in check. Now that’s just good worldbuilding.
Unfortunately you have to suffer over 15 minutes of Zyx, which feels like 15 hours.
He’s so insufferable that even Brainiac 5 is willing to admit he was wrong if it means getting rid of the pest.
And it STILL doesn’t work.
Seriously: the 5 minute side quest that focuses on bureaucracy? THAT’s the great part!
Good news: they will send someone to take back Zyx!
Bad news: according to a sorcerer who isn’t supposed to remind us of anyone…
…the fact that Phantom Girl was not invited to Sorcerer’s World means they are now at war with the United Planets.
I would question whether these guys had a whole fleet ready to go, but considering their powers, the fleet might not have existed until a second ago.
This is presumably the problem that Phantom Girl’s mother had: these guys follow their rules regardless of whether they make any sense.
Phantom Girl tries the logical approach…
…which actually gives her an opening.
And in the unquestionably best part of the episode, she finds her way around the rules.
Meanwhile, the Legion has been keeping Zyx busy by making him concentrate on multiple targets until he drops from exhaustion.
After watching this episode? I feel you, buddy.
The alien leader repairs all the damages and takes care of Zyx once and for all.
Well, not really, he’ll return in Season 2, but we’re safe for a while.
And it turns out this was even a complete diplomatic success!!!
Possibly because he has a thing for Phantom Girl’s mother. Who is even explicitly named this time!
If you’re curious: it’s pronounced “ween-ema”, not “why-nema”.
A great day for Phantom Girl after all!
Well… mostly.
Animated significance: 4/10
As mentioned, Zyx will eventually return. I wonder if that familiar looking wizard will turn out to be anyone important? Eh, it’s probably nothing.
Does any of this show up in regular continuity?
As far as I can tell, Zyx is only in this series.
Silver Age-ness: 8/10
I can definitely see this story in the 60s.
Does it stand the test of time? 5/10
I had MUCH better memories of this. The Phantom Girl scenes are excellent and, on their own, would even be worth of a 10/10.
She brings a ton of personality, the bureaucracy gags are good, and there is legit thought behind what could initially look like randomness.
Unfortunately these scenes are MUCH shorter than I remembered: they’re maybe a third of the episode. The rest is all about Zyx, who… holy crap is he annoying.
The contrast with Mr. Mxyzptlk couldn’t be starker: they’re both supposed to be insufferable in-universe, but Mxy has a fun personality and comes up with entertaining uses of his powers… Zyx is just bad, through and through.
I highly suggest checking out this episode exclusively for the Phantom Girl scenes: do yourself a favor and skip everything else.