Adventure Comics 303

ADVENTURE COMICS 303 (1962)
by Jerry Siegel and John Forte

We begin with Brainiac 5 and Cosmic Boy visiting injured Legionnaires at the hospital, where they’re being treated with “fourth dimensional surgery”:

What’s fourth dimensional surgery, you may ask? Something rather cool, actually: basically surgery with intangible tools.

It’s audition time, and we have a new member… Matter-Eater Lad!!!

Lightning Lad’s reaction to him is just the best.

Even better: his origin? He comes from planet BISMOLL, where everything is poison.
So they evolved the power to eat anything!

Sounds legit.

I know what you’re thinking: “how is this power useful”!?
Matter-Eater Lad has an answer ready: to bust you out of jail!

I should probably comment on the fact that Cosmic Boy and Sun Boy are among the Legionnaires who would have the least problems escaping a jail with metal bars, but I’m more disturbed by the way M.E.L. eats.

THAT PICTURE HAUNTS MY NIGHTMARES.

The Science Police (in their first official mention) asks the Legion to keep an eye over a shipment of valuable metals that has been disguised as an old Sputnik satellite.

But once the Legion gets there, someone steals the Sputnik.

Because only the Legion was informed about the Sputnik’s real purpose, they believe they are being spied.

Matter-Eater Lad is an easy suspect, but Cosmic Boy dismisses the idea of accusing him without reason and starts the meeting… in the dark to avoid being filmed by a possible hidden camera.

Nice artistic choice, giving a very creepy atmosphere. You rarely see these kind of scenes in the Silver Age.

Cosmic Boy and Chamelon Boy go undercover to deliver a doomsday bomb to the Science Police.
Which is especially easy for Chamelon Boy.

Specifically, they are going undercover inside a tube-car.

What’s a tube-car, you may ask? It’s A ROCKET THAT TRAVELS THROUGH EARTH.

Which you survive by TAKING A PILL THAT FREEZES YOU SOLID.

Remember, the Legion is inside the tube-car because they need to deliver a bomb to the Science Police. So they decided the best vehicle to use is one where you are unconscious during the entire trip!!! Which means, of course…

se…

You don’t say.

Since only the Legion was informed about this delivery, it’s suggested there could be a spy among them. Cosmic Boy refuses to believe this, suggesting that maybe a telepath is reading their minds.

Their solution: goofy telepath-proof helmets!

Their next mission is about Meglaro, who is… I can’t possibly give it justice.
Take it away, Cosmic Boy:

Yes, Meglaro, who is such an unstoppable menace that the Legion’s plan to deal with him is to use a time machine to send him 100 million years into the future!

Meglaro sounds AWESOME, doesn’t he? An immensely powerful telepath who is almost indestructible! Sadly, he’s not giant-size. He looks WAY less menacing in context.

As you might expect, this mission fails as well: Meglaro manages to escape.

This cements the idea that there’s a traitor in the Legion.

To look for the truth, Brainiac 5 builds a Guilt-Detector ™ while Matter-Eater Lad suggests that he might be evil like the original Brainiac.

The Guilt-Detector ™ shows that Matter-Eater Lad is the spy, and he’s able to escape by eating through the metal bars blocking the corridor.

I know M.E.L. will later be revealed to eat at super-speed, but how did he manage to escape so easily? He can’t be faster than Lightning Lad’s electricity, Cosmic Boy’s magnetism or Saturn Girl’s telepathy!
I’m on the fence about Sun Boy, but I’ll grant him he could escape Bouncing Boy.

This is extremely bad luck for the Legion: now the Science Police won’t allow them to set foot on planet Umrax to guard “the greatest treasure of the universe”.

Brainiac 5 is so pissed of at this that he hunts Matter-Eater Lad alone. The rest of the Legion doesn’t join him because…

…

…I have no idea.

Especially since he brings back Matter-Eater Lad LITERALLY THE NEXT PANEL:

But if Matter-Eater Lad is innocent, who is the real culprit?
Be ready for a classic Brainiac 5 moment.

Yes, the Legion was being spied by A MINIATURIZED GUY INSIDE A MEDICAL DEVICE inside one of their member’s bones!!!

And here’s why Matter-Eater Lad was being a dick to Brainiac 5 and why he was accused by the Guilt-Detector ™: he was working with Brainy the whole time!!!

AND the reason why he talked about Umrax: to send the criminals into a trap!

As for Meglaro: Superboy exiles him into the distant future.
Unfortunately this is the last time we see Meglaro… giving the connection to the Legion’s future you might expect the Time Trapper to bail him out, but no, he never appears again.

As an additional bonus: the shrinking ray used by the criminals had a connection to the technology of the original Brainiac, allowing Brainiac 5 to cancel out some of his ancestor’s crimes.

 

Legion significance: 2/10
First Matter-Eater Lad, who despite his utter ridiculousness will become a fan favorite (especially once he embraces that ridiculousness), as well as the first Science Police.
Despite this, neither do anything particularly significant in this issue. Meglaro could’ve been a very effective threat but he’s just forgotten to time.

Silver Age-ness: 5/10
Despite his looks, Meglaro is treated very seriously. And most of the fantastical technology is either explained in the story or is based on previous DC lore.
I’m tempted to give it a 2/10…but there’s a planet named BISMOLL where people can eat anything.

Does it stand the test of time? 8/10
Surprisingly well! The final twist is explained in detail, instead of coming out of absolutely nowhere as it often happens in this period. I wouldn’t say it’s possible to figure it out, but we do get some hints here and there about what’s really going on.

We are legion

• 11 active in this story: Brainiac 5, Cosmic Boy, Lightning Lad, Sun Boy, Saturn Girl, Triplicate Girl, Chameleon Boy, Bouncing Boy, Shrinking Violet, Matter-Eater Lad, Superboy
• 6 not appearing but officially members: Colossal Boy, Invisible Kid, Phantom Girl, Supergirl, Ultra Boy, Mon-El
• 1 unknown: Star Boy as usual

How much Legion is too much?
With Matter-Eater Lad joining, the Legion currently has 18 members.

 A hundred years in the future, you say?
Yes we’re still in the 21st century. And spying technology is either stuck in the 20th century with cameras and radio devices, or it’s advanced to telepathy and fourth dimensional surgery.

 

Interesting letters (sorry about the quality of the scan): someone asks why doesn’t Superboy depose dictators.

And someone else asks how Marilyn Monroe’s death will affect reprints of Bizarro issues (WTF!?):

I understand the letter writer’s sentiment, but maybe it’s not a topic suited for a comic book with panels like: