ADVENTURE COMICS 310 (1963)
by Edmond Hamilton and John Forte
This story is notable for two reasons:
1) it finally acknowledges the existence of Star Boy
2) it’s the stupidest Legion story yet
Yes, Star Boy is FINALLY mentioned in a Legion story. Here it is!
That’s it. That’s his ONLY mention or appearance in the entire story.
Hey, you have to start somewhere, right?
We begin with the Legion doing some routine work, which consists of inspecting the Flying Belts ™ and overhauling their weapons.
Which they never use, by the way.
Then the Legion receives an emergency call: someone is using Cosmic Boy’s powers.
Strangely, the Science Police says that Cosmic Boy is the only one with magnetic powers… but by this point it’s already been established that there’s AN ENTIRE PLANET with those powers!
That’s when we meet the villain of this story: “Mask Man”.
If you think that he’s lame now… well, you’re right, but he gets WAY worse.
Still, he’s quite a powerhouse.
So… he has a bad design, but not as bad as Urthlo. What makes him lame?
There’s nothing I can add to that image.
Understandably angry for being laughed at, Mask Man proceeds to MURDER ULTRA BOY:
Look at the second panel. I know John Forte draws the Legionnaires a little too stiff, but this is ridiculous!
Also, Superboy is WAY too quick to declare there’s nothing that can save him, considering the entire Legion has spent every single issue since Lightning Lad’s death repeating that they will do everything they can to resurrect him!
Lightning Lad died to save Earth from an alien invasion.
Ultra Boy died because a guy who wears stilts shot him.
So, because apparently in the 30th there are no short people, the Legion searches for Mask Man on Doll World.
Naturally, Shrinking Violet and Chameleon Boy are the best candidates to look for him there.
Although… just how small is Mask Man supposed to be, exactly?
Once he has his stilts, he’s as tall as a regular human. Without them, is he supposed to be a dwarf? Shrinking Violet and Chameleon Boy look way smaller than that!
Shrinking Violet finds him and dies.
Apparently being struck by lightning looks exactly like fainting. Who knew.
Oh, and Chameleon Boy dies too.
Is that how small Mask Man is supposed to be? The art is weirder than usual, and that’s saying something!
Mask Man keeps demonstrating new powers, including the power to command Saturn Girl to die.
Brainiac 5 saves her by KNOCKING HER OUT.
In what is easily the least stupid moment of the story, Superboy makes sure the team has a way to follow Mask Man.
Not that it works, mind you.
The situation is pretty grim, and the Legion decides to make a last stand.
By which I mean they build a brand new Citadel in… I don’t know, days? Hours?
Not that it works, mind you.
Brainiac 5, not knowing ANYTHING about Mask Man’s powers, is at work on a device to shut down his powers.
Not that it works, mind you.
Every Legion member is dead, except Superboy and Mon-El.
Well…
So far the story has been pretty weird, but nothing has been spectacularly goofy or stupid… Mask Man’s design notwithstanding. At least we have a genuine mystery.
Ready to be disappointed?
Who am I kidding, you’re not ready for this.
Yep.
We’re really doing this.
*sigh*
Let’s just be done with this.
At least the Legion forgets everything that happened in this story.
You have no idea how I wish I forgot this one too…
Legion significance: 0/10
Significance of what? Sorry, I zoned out for 17 pages of idiocy.
Silver Age-ness: 10/10
Do I HAVE to explain why?
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
Look… I actually really like Mr. Mxyzptlk. A lot. But there’s a right way to to a Mxyzptlk story, and then there’s THIS.
We are legion
- 16 active in this story: Cosmic Boy, Saturn Girl, Bouncing Boy, Chameleon Boy, Triplicate Girl, Brainiac 5, Star Boy, Superboy, Ultra Boy, Colossal Boy, Element Lad, Invisible Kid, Lightning Lass, Sun Boy, Shrinking Violet, Mon-El. That’s the highest number of active Legionnaires, in a tie with the story of Lightning Lad’s death.
- 3 not appearing but officially members: Phantom Girl, Supergirl, Matter-Eater Lad
- 1 deceased: Lightning Lad
How much Legion is too much?
The Legion now includes 19 members.
There is something I really like about the silver age legion and this one I just love. Why? Because it is so silver agey. I think in a lot of ways this is the ancestor of Alan Moore’s last superman story. It was just written in a time where no one went dark like Moore does in that story. The worst thing that can be said about it is that it’s a product of it’s time and I can’t dislike it for that. There are TONS of silverage stories that go absolutely nowhere. This is not one of them. The story goes where it should go. The premise is fantastic. “Hey what if we wrote a different kind of Mr. Mxyzptlk story… one where he isn’t just doing dumb pranks… one where he actually murders everyone in the legion.” You can hate the silver age execution, but man, I love the premise.
In my headcannon the Universe was conquered by the Dutch before the 30th century- therefore everyon is tall