SHOWCASE 38 (1962)
by Robert Kanigher & Ross Andru
The Metal Men switch to their specialty (other than dying): fighting other robots.
Apparently the Metal Men, “our answer to Sputniks”, are incredibly popular in-universe.
This upsets “a foreign country” so much that they hire evil scientist Von Vroom (sometimes spelled Von Vroon) to destroy them… despite the fact that their first issue ended with the Metal Men being destroyed!
Wait, if the people don’t know that the Metal Men are robots, why are they “the answer to Sputnik”?
Surprisingly enough, Dr.Magnus is reluctant to rebuild the Metal Men because he doesn’t want to see them suffer.
And so the Metal Men 2.0 are ready in no time? Can we expect Dr.Magnus to treat them with more respect?
Don’t count on it.
Still, something’s off about this new version. Can’t quite put my finger on what.
Then A GIANT FREAKING ROBOT attacks!
Don’t worry, the Metal Men have things under control.
Well at least the Air Force can deal with the giant robot, right?
The robot disappears by burrowing into the ground (!!!), and the Metal Men are treated with all the gratitude they deserve.
Aaaand the Metal Men are destroyed. AGAIN.
Dr.Magnus figures out that he can’t replicate the original Metal Men because they were affected by… wait for it… Aurora Borealis.
Sounds legit.
So it’s time to recover the remains of the original Metal Men.
Including carrying LEAD from the bottom of the ocean.
Dr.Magnus rebuilds the Metal Men, switching them on with a button on their backs (???) and STOP ENCOURAGING MERCURY!!!
And of course Platinum is still crazy.
The Metal Men go to the World’s Fair to get some recognition, and they almost bump into their newest nemesis… a guy who almost defeats himself with a carousel.
Clearly we are dealing with the next Lex Luthor here.
So, uhm, are we going to see any superhero action in this superhero book?
Ladies and gentlemen, the most chilled dude in DC Comics.
The giant robot defeats the fighter jets AGAIN, and for once the Metal Men are of moderate use.
You could see this gag coming a mile away.
Tina gets 99% of the characterization of the Metal Men, but there are some dynamics that are quickly established:
A) Iron and Lead are best buddies
B) Mercury is a jackass
C) Gold is unbearably bland
D) Nobody gives a f#ck about Tin
Gold pretty much takes down the giant robot by himself, despite some lip service to Tin being useful (he really isn’t).
Except…
No worries: Mercury takes care of that one!
OH COME ON!!!
Okay are Iron and Lead going to do ANYTHING except rubbing each other!?
You’ve got to be kidding me…
Time for all the Metal Men to fight the not-so-giant robot together!
Aaaand they fail.
Dr.Magnus leads the robot into the funhouse, and more specifically into the giant spinning wheel inside it.
So… yeah. The funhouse was more useful than the Metal Men.
And so, once Dr. Magnus rebuilds the Metal Men once again, we are mercifully at the end.
Metal Men significance: 6/10
The idea that the Metal Men are unique thanks to the effects of Aurora Borealis will be brought up often, especially for Platinum. Dr.Magnus will have less and less issues with rebuilding them and they will be rebuilt more and more easily as the time goes by.
Silver Age-ness: 9/10 
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
This doesn’t exactly make the case that the Metal Men are effective heroes.
“Mercury is the only liquid metal at room temperature”: 3
Notably, Mercury himself has only said it once so far. Dr. Magnus really should stop encouraging him.
Times Gold has died: 3
Times Iron has died: 3
Times Lead has died: 3
Times Mercury has died: 3
Times Platinum has died: 3
Times Tin has died: 3
The Cold War was running strong when this was written! I liked how the monster was basically a Russian Babushka doll. And, of course, both sides did make use of ex-nazi scientists, so there’s that.