KARATE KID #9 (1977)
by David Michelinie & Ric Estrada
cover by Al Milgrom
The previous issue is one of the dumbest things I have ever reviewed (AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING), so this one can’t possibly get any worse, right?
Right?
This time we’re going to get the backstory of Pulsar, beginning with the fact that the one who gave him his super-suit also has a switch that can kill him instantly if he gets hostile.
But enough about that, we have a romantic subplot to worry about!
If anything, these issues are giving me plenty of material to summarize my opinion of the entire series.
Honestly at this point I’m rooting for Pulsar.
See, what did I tell you? I don’t even need to review, I can just post these reaction shots!
You might think that leaving Projectra behind is a bad idea… but she just caught Karate Kid ready to cheat on her, so I don’t blame him for wanting to get the hell away.
Okay so last time I complained that Karate Kid shouldn’t lose a one-on-one fight with a rando like Pulsar, but I might swallow it if it’s just a one-off thing.
At this point the only explanation is that Marvel Comics is paying Karate Kid to lose every single fight.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you’re all been waiting for… no, not the end of the series: the explanation of who is behind Karate Kid’s reason for staying in the past!
And the answer is… Princess Projectra’s father!
That won’t get resolved in this issue, but I promise you, you are going to be disappointed once you learn why her father is doing this.
Meanwhile Pulsar has taken Karate Kid to his employer, and since he refuses to murder him (BUT WHY!?), the employer reveals that he has taken Pulsar’s wife hostage.
The bad guy could just kill Karate Kid right now, but instead he locks him and Pulsar inside a giant microwave oven.
THAT’S NOT HOW MICROWAVE OVENS WORK!!!
While we’re waiting for the sound waves to cook them alive (no comment), Pulsar reveals his origin. Which is slightly reminiscent of Cardiac, a villain that Michelinie will create in his Spider-Man run.
And here’s the best part about Pulsar: the artificial heart provided by the mob?
IT’S NUCLEAR.
Karate Kid manages to escape, beats up the bad guys and confiscates the remote control which SOMEHOW means Pulsar loses his powers and is no longer in danger of blowing up.
If that feels rushed, it’s because the comic wants to FINALLY get away from the 20th century.
And seriously, who’s complaining? THIS COMIC STILL SUCKS.
Still too awful to deserve words.
Historical significance: 0/10
Silver Age-ness: 10/10
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10