What The…?! #10

Have you ever wondered what Doctor Doom does during Christmas?

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What The…?! #10 (1990)
“I’ll be Doom for Christmas”
by Scott Lobdell & John Byrne

It’s Christmas eve, and Doctor Doom is sitting alone in his castle.

Most Doctor Doom fans know that he used to fight the Devil every Midsummer Eve for the soul of his mother (until he freed her from Hell).
But did you also know he fights Santa Claus every year as well?

Doom’s security system has injured Santa, so you understand why his reindeers are not big fans.

And that is how Doctor Doom became the new Santa Claus. True story.

This is one of the greatest artistic achievements of mankind.

I don’t care all that much about Christmas, so I’m not well versed in the lore… are the reindeers immortal? Because if they’re not, I don’t think they’ll reach the new year.

Doctor Doom’s rocket-powered sled (!!!) is so fast that even the reindeer have trouble keeping up.

The first people to receive gifts from Santa Doom are the Avengers, of all people.

Not only Doom has to deliver gifts to the heroes, but he discovers that the Avengers are also giving Christmas gifts to their villains.

Sounds legit.
Although I was under the impression that the Avenger villains received their gifts from someone else.

Doom is not great at stealth.

Next on the list are the Fantastic Four. And if you ever doubted Doctor Doom is the real hero here: he brings gifts to his arch-enemies and they don’t!

Unfortunately the Avengers (and Speedball for some reason) have followed Santa Doom.
This turns into, of course, a big dumb holiday fight.

The fight is interrupted by OH GOD, WHAT’S UP WITH HER FACE!?

That’s because the fight extended to the Hospital For Sickly Children, a subsidiary of Convenient Drama Incorporated.

Rather than break their hearts, Santa Doom clarifies that the heroes are actually his helpers!

We all know Doom is a big old softie.

Weeks later, Santa has recovered enough to leave Latveria… and Doctor Doom can’t help but turning this occasion into a threat.

There’s still the matter of Doom’s compensation… Santa had promised him his heart’s desire.
But Doom refuses, something that is actually consistent with canon: Doom has always rejected being handed control over the planet by someone else. Where’s the fun in that, after all?

I was expecting to find out this was part of Santa’s plan all along… but nope, he really doesn’t get Doctor Doom.

As always, Doom gets the last laugh.

And that is the story of how Doctor Doom saved Christmas.

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Doom significance: /10
Despite being a story in the “What The…?!” parody series, you cannot convince me this is not canon. After all, Santa WILL meet Doom again!

Silver Age-ness: /10
The Golden Age was full of heroes meeting Santa, why not the Silver Age?

 Does it stand the test of time? 25/12

Times Doctor Doom has taken over the world: 3

Times Doom has saved the world: 9

Times Doom has saved Christmas: 1

Number of superheroes who have fought Dr. Doom: 89
Does this count as Doom fighting Santa? It’s not supposed to be canon, so I’m not counting it. Speedball also isn’t in the list… yet. For the moment, the list remains unchanged.

Crazy tech
Doom’s rocket-powered sled is faster than Santa’s reindeers. Think about that for a second.