Big Town #1-4

Let’s return to Doctor Doom’s What If appearances. This time we’ll take a look at a relatively obscure miniseries.
Kind of weird that it’s not more well-known, considering it’s written by Steve Englehart!
It tackles a problem that has always troubled superheroes: you can’t have them solve too many real world problems, otherwise you’ll alienate the audience.
But it IS a story worth telling: what if the absurd technologies and magic of a superhero world actually changed the world?
I don’t think I’ve ever read any story that provides a fully satisfying answer, but let’s see how Englehart tries.
Even though, as usual, I will mostly focus on Doctor Doom.

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Big Town #1 (2000)
by Steve Englehart & Mike McKone

Another thing that surprises me: why doesn’t Mike McKone get more work? This artwork is amazing! Kind of a blend of Alan Davis and Mark Bagley.

The main starting point is that Reed Richards and Tony Stark (plus to a much lesser extent Hank Pym) have used their technology to change the world.

As usual, Reed doesn’t think too much about it.

We immediately see just how much things are different in this timeline because Silver Surfer is working for Doctor Doom, SOMEHOW.

Also the Human Torch is getting married. This plot takes up a HUGE part of the miniseries, but I think it’s by far the most boring part. Mostly because his fiancée doesn’t have anything interesting about her.

The other frustrating part of the miniseries is that, despite all the talk on how much the world has changed… Reed’s technology doesn’t seem to have had THAT much of an impact.

Everything looks a little more futuristic, crime is very low, and there’s tons of superheroes merchandise… but that’s about it as far as the vast majority of the world is concerned.

Not everything is better, however, as we’re told by Johnny’s fiancée.
The X-Men were never founded in this timeline, so mutants ended up being petty criminals and have TERRIBLE codenames!
Beast stays the same, and Ice instead of Iceman is fine. But Angel is Deva (WTF!?), Cyclops is Psych (double WTF!?) and Marvel Girl is “Grrl” (trpl WTF!?)

She’s caught between the mutants and the X-Squad, which is a team of humans that have been given powers to be… essentially New York’s super-human police.

Also one of them is the brother of Johnny’s fiancée.
Yeah she has a name, but… like I said not interesting.

Adding to the contrivance irony, the members of X-Squad were given powers by Xavier and Pym.

The Avengers still exist in this continuity. It’s mostly a pretty standard roster… Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, Hawkeye, Black Panther, Wasp are all to be expected.
Mockingbird is a bit surprising, but Englehart did write her a lot when he was on West Coast Avengers.
He also wrote the Swordsman in the 70s, but I don’t know if he’s in this team because of that or because he’s mostly dead in the main continuity and this is a quick representation of a different timeline.

In this flashback, the Avengers are fighting the Knights of Doom… which are regular people in powered armors led by a brainwashed Silver Surfer working for Doctor Doom.
If you have FREAKING SILVER SURFER working for you, why do you need ANYONE ELSE!?

As mentioned Englehart wrote Mockingbird during West Coast Avengers, and he loved her plots so much he’s doing the same thing again. This time at least it comes without a not-so-subtle rape allegory.

It’s been too many pages without Doctor Doom, so let’s rectify that.
Because at the Latverian Embassy we see that he’s made some unusual allies in this timeline.
Namor is obviously there (no timeline can break their bromance). Magneto and the Hulk make sense. Ultron is a weird choice, since I would’ve expected Doom to reprogram him.
And of course there’s the usual outlier of Red Skull, which always clashes when we have organizations of non-nazi supervillains.

I can PARTIALLY defend the Red Skull being in the same team of Magneto during Acts of Vengeance because Magneto didn’t initially believe this was the real Nazi but an impostor.
It was a retcon, sure, but it made SOME sense at the very least.
This timeline doesn’t have that excuse so… WTF Magneto!?

Now don’t be shocked, but these supervillains who have basically nothing in common except clinging to power… don’t get along.

When NAMOR is the voice of reason in your team, you know it won’t last long!

Doom’s secret weapon is an alliance with a supporting character: the other brother of Johnny’s fiancée. The one who didn’t get superpowers but who won a contest as a Tony Stark impersonator.

Speaking of Tony Stark, it wouldn’t be a Steve Englehart story without some weird relationship s#it.
Like him sleeping with Wasp because she’s in an open marriage with Hank Pym.

Johnny and his fiancée run into another mutant team: these working for Magneto.
For some reason they don’t get weird new names; the only change is that Quicksilver gets some facial hair.

They end up being saved by the rest of the Fantastic Four. How come Reed gets to make a joke against codenames but everyone let “Grrl” slide earlier? (seriously, WTF was up with that name?)

And that’s how the first issue ends… with basically nothing happening despite this being a 39 page story.

I wonder if this will become a trend for the remaining 3 issues?
Spoiler alert: IT WILL.

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Big Town #2 (2001)
by Steve Englehart & Mike McKone

These three don’t look happy to be in this series. Then again, I don’t want to see Ultron happy.

So the first issue was kind of a missed opportunity. But the second one compensates by starting with the best thing about this whole miniseries: Doom’s discussion with Reed.

It’s honestly a shame that Englehart spent sooooo much time with the Kristoff plot when he was writing Fantastic Four: why wasn’t THIS incredible dialogue in the regular series!?

It’s an efficient but deep dive into the fundamental differences between the two men. How they see the world, how they see each other… it’s just one page (plush a splash page with the establishing shot), but this is good writing.

But the dialogue between the two is scattered towards the issue; it’s less efficient, but still well done. It’s also an interesting reversal of the usual situation: Doom is against what Reed has done because he doesn’t believe people should live under the hegemony of a single way of life.
Unless HE gets to be the one to dictate how people should live, presumably, but it’s more nuanced than usual.

Too bad 99% of the rest of the miniseries is lost in pointless navel-gazing and random fights.

And I still don’t buy this alliance.

Namor, Hulk and Ultron are ultimately defeated and captured by Henry Pym.

Englehart… you really can’t help yourself with this stuff, isn’t it?

Also Johnny’s fiancée is “pregant”.

Issue 2 was only 24 pages long, but almost nothing happened anyway. Again.

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Big Town #3 (2001)
by Steve Englehart & Mike McKone

Okay at this point McKone is doing this on purpose: is ANYONE happy to be on those covers!?

This is a weird distinction: this series is not a “What If?” because history is not changed by a single factor, but… it’s still a universe where Reed Richard’s actions changed everything, so what’s the distinction?
Also: it’s a story with good artwork, a great premise with a couple of interesting turns, and a waste of plots that go nowhere 99% of the time… this IS like Earth-X!!!

The Knights of Doom are fighting the Avengers AGAIN, and Mockingbird tries to get through Silver Surfer’s mind control.

It doesn’t work, plus trying to figure out how the reflection of Doom’s mask doesn’t quite match Surfer’s head makes MY head hurt.

Oh so she IS pregnant. Don’t worry Johnny, I also read “pregant”.

And then OUT OF FREAKING NOWHERE the story brings up abortion! Seriously Johnny, that is one heck of a jump from what the discussion was!!!

Also, uhm… we’re going to have Steve Englehart handle such a heavy topic.

But yeah, we’re REALLY going there.
Also, because this is the Internet… the topic will NOT be discussed in the comments. I have wonderful readers and the comment section has always been outstanding, but I just know this topic attracts weirdos.

If anything, discuss why exactly doctor Don Blake being secretly Thor allows him to recognize a woman is a few weeks pregnant AT A GLANCE.

Also, just to be clear: it’s not that I don’t want a superhero comic to talk about this. It’s not even that I don’t trust Englehart not to go into weird tangents.
But WTF does this have to do with the premise of the miniseries!? The Fantastic Four are celebrities in every continuity, it’s not like you can’t make this plot anywhere else: why here?
Well I know why… because it’s a What If so it doesn’t “really” happen… but still, this takes the oxygen out of every other plot going on.

Another thing that you could do in regular continuity but doesn’t have anything to do with the premise of this miniseries? Red Skull behind a neo-nazi cult that worships Asgardians.
That would be a great premise for a Thor storyline: who doesn’t want to see nazis beaten up by a giant hammer?

In the end, Johnny’s fiancée decides she does want to have his baby because she saw him save Black Panther from Red Skull.

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Big Town #4 (2001)
by Steve Englehart & Mike McKone

Okay at least I can understand WHY Doom and Magneto are not happy on the cover! They don’t like the company.

It’s the Human Torch’s wedding day, and come on… CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO THE MAIN PLOT ALREADY!? We were supposed to be done with this plot last issue!!!

You know what this miniseries about Reed Richards changing the world with super-technology needed? Discussions about abortions and how he “accidentally” made his wife sterile!

Things FINALLY go back to the plot when Doom’s forces cut power to the entire city.

So… you powered the biggest city in the world with a new revolutionary technology that can explode like a nuke!? The smartest man in the world, ladies and gentlemen!

Reading this miniseries is a constant barrage of “oh yeah I remember that subplot we haven’t touched in fifty pages, why did we waste time with other stuff?”.
Honestly, I completely forgot the whole “mutants versus X-Squad” thing.

There is ONE good thing about the main plot about villains sabotaging the city: they can’t fathom the idea that Reed would throw ten years of his work away, even if it’s needed to save millions of people. But Reed doesn’t hesitate in the slightest.

This is where all hell breaks loose: Atlanteans attack (because that’s apparently also a thing), plus the mutants revolt, AND Silver Surfer brings the Knights of Doom again.

So naturally the focus of the story is somewhere else entirely.

Even Doctor Strange and Daredevil show up, despite being nowhere to be seen up to this point.
It’s not like it would’ve been interesting to see how Strange reacted to having fewer superhuman threats to deal with, or Daredevil reacting to regular street crime vanishing.

Captain Britain is Captain Euro in this universe. That alone has enough worldbuilding potential to cover a whole issue, but it’s never addressed. What is this timeline, Bizarro Brexit?

Sorry but you’re not getting any sympathy from me, Reed. You guys keep TALKING about the changes you’ve made, but we BARELY see anything!!!

You know what we haven’t seen for a couple of pages? The pregnancy storyline!
(also: I don’t speak Spanish, but shouldn’t she call her daughter “carina” instead of “carino”?)

You can’t have a pregnant woman in a story without her fainting at some point.
It’s the rules.

Not gonna lie, this is a badass Susan moment.

Meanwhile Quicksilver (who works with Magneto) ends up killing Hawkeye.

Okay I like Mockingbird, but she gets the drop on Magneto!? COME ON!!!

Iron Man manages to restart the city’s power, which SOMEHOW results in Silver Surfer being freed from Doom’s control? WHY!?

Which results in a fight between Silver Surfer and Doctor Doom WHICH WE DON’T GET TO SEE.

And believe it or not, it’s ALREADY the time for epilogues.
Bet you thought that Johnny’s fiancée having a brother in the X-Squad was going to be important? Nope!!!

Bet you thought that mutants being hunted by superheroes was going to be important? Nope!!!

Bet you thought that Doom mind-controlling Silver Surfer was going to be important? Nope!!!

No the REAL focus of this entire story was Johnny’s fiancée being pregnant…

…AND THEN THE PREGNANCY KILLS HER.

With Johnny never learning that his powers caused the pregnancy that killed her; instead they tell him she died in “an accident”.

Seriously, THAT’S HOW IT ENDS.

And now you know why everyone is so upset on the covers!!!

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Did any of this show up in continuity? Nope!
The closest thing is Ultron using multiple bodies simultaneously, but even that is not unprecedented.

Silver Age-ness: 2/10
Some of the changes are bonkers enough to qualify, but just barely.

Does it stand the test of time? 3/10
Ah, Big Town… what a disappointment. It starts off a bit meandering but well-meaning, then it goes in an interesting direction. Then forgets everything to focus on the pregnancy plot and little else. And THEN it just ends rather abruptly!
A real shame because Englehart IS a good writer when he doesn’t go into weird tangents, but by the middle of the second issue he seems to have lost interest on what he started and goes somewhere else entirely.
The impact brought by Reed’s tech is WAY too vague to really mean anything, the chances on the familiar timeline are either random or have barely any connection to the main plot, and Englehart continues to get distracted with new plots that don’t go anywhere.
I can’t recommend this one except for completionists and fans of Mike McCone. To be fair, the artwork IS solid enough to hold a lot of the weight, but the focus is just all over the place.
The exception is the phenomenal scene between Reed and Doom at the beginning of issue 2. Not only it’s well-written, but it’s WHAT THE STORY WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT!!!