Last issue of Thor in the retrospective.
Thor #186 (1978)
Published by: Corno
This late in the run, sometimes speech bubbles do appear on the cover.
There’s the title (a correct translation of the original “If the Stars Be Made of Stone!”), and Thor is yelling “I will challenge you, monster… to the death!”
Thor #258 (1977)
by Len Wein & John Buscema
cover by Jack Kirby
Which A) is not exactly what Thor is saying in the original cover B) completely skips Grey Gargoyle’s speech bubble.
This was my first exposure to Grey Gargoyle, and it’s WEIRD.
He’s normally just a regular supervillain who goes after precious stuff… but here he’s the captain of an alien ship!
He’s just called Gargoyle in the translation, which is kind of weird. A full literal translation would simply be “Gargoyle Grigio” which would keep the alliteration, but it’s never used.
What’s up with that? Well, in his previous appearance in 1973’s Marvel Team-Up #13, he was shot into space. This will be recapped in Thor #259.
But back to the Thor story. We’re in the Len Wein era now, which means Sif is slightly more tolerable than during the Conway era… but not by much.
But it’s also the first appearance of one of my absolute favorite Marvel minor players: the alien robot Recorder.
Supposition: his speech pattern might become tiresome for some.
Rebuttal: I can never get enough of him.
Thor’s magic ship is then attacked by the space pirates that Grey Gargoyle now leads.
Keep in mind that:
1) Thor wasn’t looking for Grey Gargoyle
2) Grey Gargoyle wasn’t looking for Thor
3) Thor wasn’t looking for the space pirates
4) The space pirates were not looking for Thor
And yet BY AN AMAZING COINCIDENCE they still found each other IN DEEP SPACE.
The space pirates are no match for the Asgardians, but they’re defenseless against Grey Gargoyle’s gimmick: he can turn anything he touches into stone.
And so we get to the cover scene: Grey Gargoyle threatens to kill Sif if Thor doesn’t surrender, which he does.
(although she wasn’t in this position when he petrified her, and she’s not supposed to be able to move)
We get a couple of interludes. For the hundredth time Odin is taking a nap, so Balder is in charge of Asgard.
Just in time to deal with the Enchantress and Executioner. But he won’t do it in this issue.
After the interludes, Grey Gargoyle decides to enslave Thor and the Asgardians because his stone touch lasts only one hour.
Which is a rather weak reason for him not trying to kill them.
Even assuming that he can’t turn them back into stone the second the hour is over… which I’m pretty sure we’ve seen him do in other stories… couldn’t he just throw them into the nearest star while they’re made of stone?
And why doesn’t Grey Gargoyle even take away Thor’s hammer? He doesn’t know he needs it to avoid turning back into Don Blake!
This is only possible because the space pirates have shock collars that work even against Thor.
But why exactly do the space pirates need slaves? Because apparently their spaceship is powered by slave labor in the “Cosmic Furnaces”.
I do appreciate Sif pulling her weight. The Conway version would’ve been complaining all the time.
At least the Asgardians make some friends.
Fact: the Recorder is awesome.
Elaboration: he’s the only reason the Asgardians break free.
And we close the issue on the cliffhanger of the Grey Gargoyle discovering they’ve removed their shock collars.
What happens to the Grey Gargoyle next? In the following issue, he’s lost in space AGAIN when he accidentally turns his ship’s control panel into stone.
He will return to Earth in 1979’s Avengers #190. Which means Grey Gargoyle spent six years in space!
Historical significance: 0/10
I might be the only person whose first thought of Grey Gargoyle is “he used to be the leader of a space pirate crew”.
Personal significance: 7/10
I distinctly remember this one, and that I thought Grey Gargoyle was very cool. This ensured I’ll aways have a soft spot for they guy, even if he’s only been a major threat a couple of times.
It’s also yet another space adventure for Thor: adding this to the two Galactus issues I covered, no wonder I’ve never had any problem with him doing stuff unrelated to mythology and fantasy.
Silver Age-ness: 8/10
On the DC scale it would be nothing, but at Marvel the fact that Thor and Grey Gargoyle just randomly found each other… not to mention the silly idea of this guy ending up leading some space pirates… is extremely high.
Does it stand the test of time? 6/10
Not a bad story, although as it’s typical of A LOT of Thor stories in this era… Thor himself is one of the least interesting parts. He doesn’t DO a lot except fighting a couple pirates and generally being an upstanding guy… while I really appreciate giving respect to the Recorder, it really should’ve been either Thor or an Asgardian coming up with a plan to escape.
And as much as I like Grey Gargoyle, he still doesn’t rise to the occasion of being the main threat… I could buy him sneaking up on an Asgardian to use his stone touch, but it’s ridiculous how easy he dispatches of everyone.
Plus while I could excuse the idea of him not killing his enemies (given a better explanation), allowing Thor to keep his hammer is just too dumb to accept.
Captain America #206 (1977)
by Jack Kirby
At this point of Corno’s publishing, Captain America has replaced the Avengers as the backup feature. And during the Kirby run, right before the Arnim Zola stories I’ve reviewed.
I would argue that the creation of Arnim Zola is the only part of Kirby’s run that has any long-term impact. But in the short term, he also completely butchers Leila as a character.
She was introduced as an abrasive and combative woman, the kind of character that by all accounts should be completely insufferable but manages to be extremely interesting to the reader.
Kirby makes her a generic love interest.
It doesn’t help that Kirby assigns to Leila and Sharon narrative roles that seem to have been switched from their original characterization.
Leila was introduced as a social worker who criticizes Falcon and Cap because they’re busy with supervillains while ignoring societal problems.
Sharon Carter was introduced as a badass S.H.I.E.L.D. agent going into secret missions as often as Captain America himself.
You would think LEILA would be the one opposed to superhero business, but instead it’s Sharon who gets bogged down with the desire to have a normal life!
If only Kirby had switched the two roles it would’ve made PERFECT sense!
We then move to an unnamed South American country, ruled by a dictator.
He’s been punishing his opponents by making them starve. At least according to the dialogue, because while these are SUPPOSED to be extremely malnourished people they don’t look THAT bad.
The dictator agrees to let the poor guy eat whatever he wants.
Including whatever the heck THIS is supposed to be.
But it’s all a trick by the dictator: he knows the guy is so food deprived that eating too much will kill him.
The dictator is almost universally called The Swine. Definitely needs better PR because that’s not exactly a name that strikes fear into your enemies.
The food theme is continued by a double date between our heroes and their love interests.
There’s being corny, there’s being Steve Rogers, and there’s going overboard.
And then they randomly run into thugs who are after the waiter.
And Sharon is mad at Steve for no reason! What was he supposed to do???
YOU’RE A S.H.I.E.L.D. AGENT, WHY IS THIS UPSETTING YOU???
Not only you’re an agent, but you’re dating Captain America and you’re upset with him because HE’S CAPTAIN AMERICA???
They’re so busy with this dumb argument that the thugs knock them out with gas.
They didn’t even know he’s Captain America, but they discover it in one of the most famous examples why Cap’s trick of hiding his shield under his clothes shouldn’t work.
They take Steve prisoner, and Falcon is not going to be of much help.
Back to The Swine, who’s enjoying being cruel.
The only source of joy for these people is his cousin Donna Maria giving some fanservice.
Also: I never thought I would EVER compare Jack Kirby to Rob Liefeld, but… those are some misshapen feet.
Maybe she’d be slightly more impressed if you had a better name than “The Swine”, dude.
And that’s how the issue ends!
We’ve actually already seen The Swine’s defeat: he’s killed a few issues later by this monster created by Arnim Zola. 
Historical significance: 0/10
Donna Maria is basically a co-protagonist during the Arnim Zola storyline, but she later disappears and only occasionally shows up as a cameo.
The only other possible impact is that this is basically the preable of the Arnim Zola saga, and the only reason Cap ends up meeting him is that he’s in the area… but even that isn’t worth a 1/0.
Personal significance: 4/10
The scenes with the Swine killing a guy by overfeeding him, and later torturing him by having him push the fruit with his nose, really stuck with me. I completely forgot everything else.
Silver Age-ness: 3/10
This doesn’t even feel like a 1977 story; it looks like it’s from about fifteen years prior… with none of the charm.
Does it stand the test of time? 3/10
This was WAY worse than I remembered. The Swine’s scenes still kind of work, even though Kirby doesn’t really sell how malnourished the prisoners are supposed to be.
Everything else… yeesh. At the time I didn’t really know Leila or Sharon; they’re so different from the other stories I owned that I’m not even sure I recognized them.
Sharon is absolutely insufferable, as I think I’ve explained enough. Leila is completely forgettable and an extreme downgrade from her previous characterization.
Falcon is so corny he’s hard to take seriously, and Captain America is… just there.
Even the Kirby artwork, which should’ve been the selling point, is not at the same level of his other work in the 70s. It’s not the case for his entire run, mind you: the Arnim Zola issues are great.
But the writing in this is all over the place. Even without another rant about the characterization of the girls, what kind of sense does the plot make?
The Swine’s goons threaten the waiter because he’s from his country… and when a couple of guys beat up the goons, they end up kidnapping ONE of them and take him to his own country?
Sorry Jack Kirby apologists, but compare this trainwreck to the Lee&Kirby stories and try arguing that it was all Kirby doing all the work.
Champions #9 (1976)
by Bill Mantlo & Bob Hall
cover by Gil Kane
Ah, the Champions. The team that asks the question: what if we picked up members of a superhero team without even trying to make sense?
Speaking of making no sense: the team is attacked by a trio composed of Titanium Man, Crimson Dynamo and Griffin.
The first two I get: they’re Iron Man villains sure, but they’re Russian supervillains and they’re going after a team with a Russian leader (Black Widow).
What the heck is Griffin doing there? He’s just some American guy who got transformed into a monster!
Griffin doesn’t even stand up to Angel!
I suppose he might have been selected because he started out as a Beast villain, but even then it’s a stretch.
Crimson Dynamo is basically Russian Iron Man, so he might last a couple of rounds if he picked up anyone but Hercules and had a better tactic that of just throwing himself at the enemy.
Yeah good with Hercules, товарищ.
The most baffling decision about the Champions membership is not Hercules, or the fact that the team regularly includes two former X-Men.
It’s having freaking GHOST RIDER as a member!!!
I’m not TOO familiar with the original run of Ghost Rider, but I’m assuming that at the moment Johnny Blaze is fully in control.
Despite this, they’re surprisingly great at teamwork!
But said teamwork doesn’t include Angel, who can’t prevent Titanium Man from crashing on top of Hercules.
That’s where the story ended for me, because only the first half of the story was published in that issue. Maybe it’s for the best or it would’ve soured my opinion of the Champions even more.
Remember Ivan, Black Widow’s chauffeur and sidekick from her own series?
He’s basically a member of the Champions in anything but name.
This storyline introduced Darkstar, who will later join the team but is currently an adversary: this whole thing started with her and her mentor kidnapping Black Widow.
I completely forgot Darkstar had this level of training.
Her power hasn’t fully been developed yet, but she’ll become the first of several Marvel characters who can control the “Dark Force”.
She’s VERY powerful, but this is so early in her career Black Widow easily defeats her.
And we end the issue with the revelation that the current Crimson Dynamo is Ivan’s son.
Historical significance: 0/10
Unless you’re really into the surpsingly complicated succession of people using the Crimson Dynamo armor.
Personal significance: 0/10
I completely forgot I read this one. Kind of surprising since I eventually became a BIG fan of Hercules! Possibly because that story didn’t make much sense, since it started in the middle of a storyline and wasn’t even published in its entirety.
Silver Age-ness: 3/10
Still no idea what Griffin is doing there.
Does it stand the test of time? 3/10
Ah, the Champions. Sometimes you get some genuinely great stories like we’ve seen with Swarm, but most of the time you get the complete mess you’d expect from a team like this.
The Defenders are a good comparison: most of the time there’s no reason why someone is a member, but they embrace the randomness and somehow make it work.
The Champions don’t.
And that’s it for Thor. Next in the retrospective: the Fantastic Four.
“Personal significance: 4/10
The scenes with the Swine killing a guy by overfeeding him, and later torturing him by having him push the fruit with his nose, really stuck with me. I completely forgot everything else.”
Same here. Virtually everything else in Kirby’s run was a huge letdown to me, but watching The Swine be cruel for the sake of being cruel took villainy to a whole new level.
I bought the first three issues of The Champions, and, while I thought it was great to see heroes who hadn’t appeared regularly for a while (Hercules, Angel, and Iceman), it turned out to be a generic superhero team. The comparison to The Defenders is apt. They were deliberately a “non-team” without a set membership, rules, or meeting place. But with the arrival of Valkyrie and later Nighthawk, they settled into a established team with occasional guest-stars such as The Son of Satan, Luke Cage, and Yellowjacket. What made them work was the interpersonal relationships and camaraderie, which is usually what holds any fictional team together. Even professed loners such as Dr. Strange and The Hulk found a family in The Defenders.
If given time to jell, perhaps The Champions could have created their own chemistry, but the characters were thrown together without any clear purpose. Ghost Rider was included, I suppose, because he had his own series and therefore was “the star.” On paper, The Champions looked good, but in practice, the concept was ill thought out.
High five, Recorder fandom, represent.
What makes this guy so cool is that he’s basically Watcher if instead of a superpowerful godlike being, he was just a dutiful robot fulfilling his function. And also he doesn’t flip around between useless or hypocritical. He’s happy to help Thor whenever his more unique skills are needed but if God of Thunder doesn’t need help, he’s just happy to be here for his friend. Which another great point for Recorder, who doesn’t enjoy odd friendships like one between the Norse God and an alien robot chronicler? You don’t even have to work hard to excuse why Recorder is in the story, it’s just inevitable that Thor will be involved in some wild stuff and happy to let his friend tag along.
Jack Kirby – draw majestic visions of massive planets on fire in the depths of space? No problem! Draw complex machinery the size of a building that dwarfs the landscape around it, inspiring feelings of awe and dread? Easy-peasy! Draw massive superhumans engaged in a struggle so titanic it shatters the environment around them? A walk in the park.
Draw everyday clothes that don’t look like they were designed by the world’s dorkiest seven-year-old? Now hold on there! That’s a too much to ask!!!
As for the Griffin’s presence in the Champions story, I’m pretty sure it was explained that he was just some local hired muscle the Russians picked up to beef up their ranks. No clue why he in particular was chosen, but he had faced Angel before, so that may have been it.
Those Champions issues kicked off my near 50 year crush on Darkstar. Not sure what about her was so appealing to me, especially when Black Widow was already on hand. Guess I just like my hot Russian superheroines blonde. I was very irritated when Grant Morrison killed her off in one of the all-time dumbest cannon fodder deaths. (Our heroes are trapped underground with a horde of shambling zombies and one of them needs to be cornered and killed to sell the peril! How about the girl who can fly, teleport herself or others to a completely different location, fire force blasts from her hands, and encase herself or others in an impenetrable cocoon? Why, yes! That is exactly who would logically be surrounded and taken down by the shuffling, mindless masses.)
Darkstar’s death was irritating but at least she resurrected herself (with the unwilling help of a Dire Wraith) several years later.