Legion of Super-Heroes v3 #62 (1989)
by Paul Levitz & Keith Giffen
cover by Steve Lighle
Only two issue of the Magic Wars remaining, and this one might be the bleakest. Which is saying something!
We begin on “Weber’s World”, the artificial moon orbiting Earth where the United Planets keeps its bureaucracy. Despite the fact that in the previous issues the Legion (well, mostly Sensor Girl) was able to restore Earth’s technology, it’s indicative that they’ve decided to evacuate the whole place.
It means that the damages were even more widespread than we thought.
Hey at least the Legion is doing SOMETHING, by helping with the evacuation. That’s a lot more than what they’ve been doing lately!
But things are depressing. When I wished Sun Boy would stop thinking exclusively about girls, this is NOT what I had in mind!
Ambassador Relnic (remember him from Earthwar?) makes one last appearance.
One of the reasons why I dislike this storyline is that it goes WAY overboard with how everyone sees this as the end of times.
For all the talk about “science is failing”… all the general population saw was that technology was failing. Yeah that’s bad, but these people have survived Darkseid incinerating the surface of a whole planet and creating an army of billions of Superman!
They’re in a universe with Sun-Eaters AND where “I’m the last survivor of my entire planet” is not all that uncommon! And you’re telling me they consider technological failures… which at this point have been going on for a couple of days AT MOST… is the Apocalypse for them???
Moving away from Earth, Lallor is going through a similar catastrophe: Duplicate Boy has duplicated Bouncing Boy’s awful moustaches.
Oh and there’s a giant snake attacking. That’s bad too, I guess.
Well thanks for clarifying that Duplicate Boy can’t duplicate White Witch’s magic, that sure was something we had to explore since HE’S NEVER DUPLICATED HER POWERS BEFORE.
I’m fine with spending more time with the Heroes of Lallor, but not waste two entire pages on this problem nobody was thinking about and that won’t go anywhere!
Meanwhile the Legion has decided to go to Sorcerers’ World, based on Sensor Girl’s hunch that the problem has originated here.
If “science has failed”, how the heck did you come to this planet ON A SPACESHIP?
Perhaps it’s because it launched from Earth and still works because of Sensor Girl’s counterspell… but if that’s the case, what is stopping them from repeating the same counterspell on every planet?
Yes it’s going to take a long time, but are there no other people attuned to magic in the entire galaxy? Especially NOW that magic is apparently stronger than ever?
The premise of this storyline is completely botched! It’s like it’s working in reverse: the galaxy is doomed because the plot says so, and we’re working backwards to find excuses for it!
Getting to Sorcerers’ World is tricky since it’s been trapped in a disgusting spider web.
Wildfire is currently regretting not staying in Quislet’s dimension.
If “science is failing”, why is the hydrogen being sucked into space? Or is the Second Law of Thermodynamics not considered science for some arbitrary reason?
How the hell does a “what is reality” speech has to do with an attack by giant spiders???
Why are you talking about “evidence of our senses” of things that you were able to touch???
You don’t get to talk about metaphysics in a universe where “magic” HAS AN ACTUAL PHYSICAL PRESENCE!!! It’s not a matter of debate whether these things exist!!!
AAAARRRGHH!!!!
Let’s move to Colu before this stupid plot gives me an aneurysm. Surely THEY haven’t sunk to idiotic philosophical debates!
AAAARRRGHH!!!!
See what you have done, comic? You have broken Brainiac 5.
Happy with yourself?
Also, combustion is not science because they’re able to light a fire.
The Coluans are supposed to be the smartest race in the universe. If they went with the idea they were too proud to return to more primitive ways, I would’ve bought it.
But no, the Coluans are TOO STUPID to survive without technology!
In the middle of this crap, there is ONE moment that I really liked: a Coluan woman thinking she’s starving and Brainiac 5 pointing out real starvation is much worse.
This is an incredible little moment that manages to say SO much with just two panels!
Such a little gem deserved to be in a WAY better comic.
Also, Coluans are too stupid to figure out how to cook without Brainiac 5.
WHY DO THE FLIGHT RINGS KEEP WORKING???
I swear there’s absolutely no logic whatsoever in what works and what doesn’t!
You might argue that it could fit the narrative… magic being unpredictable by nature… but if that’s the case ADDRESS IT IN THE COMIC!!!
Back to Sorcerers’ World, Dawnstar gives us a good summary of what it’s like going into this storyline after a pretty good run.
Also a good summary of Wildfire’s relationship with Dawnstar.
Could they have chosen a worse sound effect?
They both get out of this, thanks in part to the weapons of the Legion Cruiser (which I guess are not based on science).
Also, again: combustion is not science according to this comic.
After the goo has been destroyed, the big reveal that necessitates a splash page is that Sorcerers’ World has been encased in… something.
Why is this so shocking? Isn’t Sorcerers’ World supposed to look completely different from moment to moment?
Back to Earth… God, even Gym’ll is insufferable in this.
Speaking of people who are now insufferable: Bouncing Boy.
ALL THEY HAVE EXPERIENCED are natural disasters and technological failures! WHY IS EVERYONE THINKING THIS IS THE END TIMES????
Back to Sorcerers’ World, the Legion can’t get through the barrier (even Phantom Girl can’t phase through). Sensor Girl points out that, since this is magically sealed, brute force won’t do anything.
And then she orders them to use brute force anyway!
IS EVERYONE IN THIS COMIC AN IDIOT???
Yes. Yes they are.
EVEN WILDFIRE SHOULD HAVE MORE SENSE THAN THIS!!!
Girl… you’re not the worst Legion leader only because Polar Boy had more time to screw things up.
They WERE accepting what they were seeing: A GIANT METAL PRISON WITH A LOCK. They couldn’t “accept” the secret behind it EXACTLY BECAUSE THEY COULDN’T SEE IT!!!
AAAARRRGHH!!!!
Sensor Girl was able to see a message that is supposed to sound terrifying.
Which sounds like nonsense to me, but apparently it means that someone has to die to unlock access to Sorcerers’ World.
Considering the origin of the threat, it would be an easy guess to think Mordru is behind this.
But if you’ve been paying attention, Mordru has been turned into a joke a long time ago.
Element Lad volunteers for the suicide mission, but Magnetic Kid decides to pull a Ferro Lad.
(too soon?)
Good thing the Flight Ring is apparently not based on science.
This would be touching and well executed if A) Magnetic Kid played any role whatsoever in this storyline B) if he had done anything worth remembering throughout his membership.
I feel bad for Magnetic Kid, though. He wasn’t given anything to do while he was in the team, and his death is basically meaningless since things WILL turn to s##t anyway.
Also good job traumatizing your own brother with your last words!!!
And so we end with a last splash page, unleashing the final boss of Volume 3 into the galaxy: the Archmage.
This was EXHAUSTING.
How does anyone reading this on a physical copy resist the urge to throw it against the nearest wall???
Legion significance: 10/10
Silver Age-ness: -0/10
Have I ever given a negative score in this category before? I might have to do it consistently throughout Volume 4.
Of course “minus zero” makes no sense, but if science doesn’t work why should math?
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
Those two panels on Colu and those with Magnetic Kid’s sacrifice would increase the score on a better comic. But everything else is so bad it doesn’t help.
What a giant pile of spoooch.
The Grid: 24 pages out of 27
no pages without a perfect grid (!!!)
3 splash pages
We are legion
With the death of Magnetic Kid, we have the final change in the roster for Volume 3.
17 active Legionnaires
7 reserve members
7 resigned members
14 deceased members
45 people have been members
52 people have been rejected
I really hate Sensor Girl’s department store mannequin look.
The plot is amateurish. It reminds me of when a friend and I decided to create our own comics in our teens. We threw in everything we could think 0f. The iconic leader type? Check. The loudmouth? Check. The religious zealot? Check. Two women–a virgin and a bitch? Check. A strongman with a fake arm? Check. A werewolf? Check. We didn’t understand why we had to have all these things. We just thought we had to because comics. It was fun to figure out what worked as we went along, but we had our own characters to play with.
I think you’re right that Giffen worked backwards so the plot would happen the way it did. He doesn’t seem to have put a lot of thought into the mechanics of the story or to critically examine the dystopian vision he was so fond of.
Alright. I’ve had it!
I’ve given this plot three issues to convince me otherwise and it has not.
This “science is failing but now magic is real oh no” plot DOES NOT work with this setting. From the first few years of the Legion, they had superscience and magic in the same universe. It was a goofy universe with science fiction nonsense like poisoned lightning and wizards like Mordru and ice cream flavored like different planets.
The team had a scientist with a force field belt so powerful nothing could penetrate it and a white witch casting spells. At the same time. Decades of Legion continuity established this firmly as a setting where magic is real and works and familiar to people and in no conflict whatsoever with advanced technology based on scientific understanding of how reality works. Every character in this story should be believe in magic and be familiar with it!
So when science starts breaking down but magic still works the Legion should immediately turn to magic-users for help understanding who or what is behind this and how to stop it. WHY IS THE WHITE WITCH NOT A MAJOR PART OF THIS STORY?!?!? That’s not even getting into the contradiction that science describes reality, so for technology based on science to fail it means the laws of physics have to be failing, but then why are machines that use nuclear fusion for energy failing while stars that naturally fuse are still working, like the Archeologist pointed out. If they spelled out that this was a magical attack on advanced machinery that didn’t affect living things or simpler machines it would make more sense. However, they still need legion rings and spaceships for the plot. Why are people not expecting the spaceships to fall apart at any moment?
People who have fought mythological characters who drink entire lakes should not be astounded that the hydra is real. People should not be thinking “Giant spiders on the sorcerer’s world? How could this be? Giant spiders are impossible!”
You could do a magic versus science conflict in this story with a magical faction from the sorcerer’s world fighting a war against Earthlings using advanced technology (with magic-using Earthlings feeling conflicted loyalty). You could even have Brainiac 5 in conflict with White Witch about which approach is better for society (if you hadn’t written them out of the lineup). But “magic is coming to the universe? how could magic be real what is magic??” does not even BEGIN to work in this setting.
This isn’t a great story, but have you forgotten that the White Witch left the team in a huff a year earlier, and that they were, in fact, trying to get in touch with her on Sorcerer’s World but couldn’t? (Due, no doubt to that “shell” around it that Magnetic Kid died to open.)
At the very least, if magic is supplanting science, Element Lad should find his powers altered from transmuting the chemical elements of the periodic table to mastery over the four classical elements of earth, air, water, and fire (and possibly wood and metal).
I get the impression we’ve put more thought into how a “science fails, magic supplants it” plot would work than the creative team did when they produced this.
I love your idea of Element Lad mastering the ancient elements!
I guess fans have the luxury–and 35 years hindsight–to figure out different approaches. I always like to give the creative team the benefit of a doubt, knowing that they were working under tight deadlines. But I do wish Levitz or the editor had stepped in to say, “Does this make sense? Is this really how we want to go out with v.3”?
This was such a frustrating storyline for me back in the day.
It did not become better in hindsight.
Can an experient penciler such as Keith Giffen really have failed to notice how silly Sensor Girl looks with that stupid thin cross on her face?
This was just an exercise on enduring plotless posturing for four issues because the volume must end without making us nostalgic for its trailing issues.
One of the worst things, and best things, about the Legion historically is that the various creators often killed off characters who had not had much exposure. Ferro Lad was killed just a few issues after he appeared, and Chemical King was hardly used at all in the ten years between when he was introduced and when he died. Magnetic Kid also just did not get much chance to develop a personality other than for us to know: a) he (understandably) carried trauma from the fireballing that burned him badly and killed his parents, and b) he was not at all interested when Lightning Lass made a romantic play for him. That was about it.
His killing was a bad thing because the character was terribly underused (although since he looked just like brother and had the same powers, and for most of his superhero career even wore one of his brother’s cast-off suits) there wasn’t much place to go with him. on the other hand, it was also a good thing because if someone had to be killed off, at least it wasn’t a character anyone much cared about.