WEST COAST AVENGERS #35 (1988)
by Steve Englehart & Al Milgrom
Say what you want about Englehart’s run on Fantastic Four: it worst parts are nowhere near as atrocious at the worst parts of his West Coast Avengers.
Despite the cover this is not a Doctor Doom story… it’s a Kristoff story.
Possibly the worst Kristoff story.
We begin with Kristoff waking up Hawkeye and his wife Mockingbird after kidnapping them at the end of the previous issue.
Al Milgrom is a top notch inker and a decent to good writer. Unfortunately his pencils are… well…
Also at this point Kristoff is supposed to be nine years old, at least according to Hawkeye. He seemed much younger in his earlier appearances.
This might be the only time we are ever shown that Kristoff is aware of having, well, Kristoff’s body. Weirdly enough, he never references this again.
It makes sense, referencing the gloriously campy Daredevil #37, but still, weird that it’s not given more prominence in future stories.
Especially since I’m fairly sure this is the only time Kristoff mentions that “the impostor” is inhabiting his original body. It makes WAY more sense than one of the other accusations he’ll have against the real Doom, that it’s actually a Doombot.
He kidnapped them because the West Coast Avengers are currently stuck in a plot about Hank Pym’s first wife, and as part of that plot they are fleeing Hungary.
Kristoff, much like the real Doom, is really into gathering allies in this period.
As for the rest of the team… the ones with actual superpowers are kept in the dungeon.
I guess now we know why Doom wears a cape and a cowl. Kristoff looks absolutely ridiculous!
Kristoff has never met Moon Knight and Tigra (Doom only met her in Emperor Doom), so in order to test them he challenges them in the only halfway decent page of the issue.
Aside for the artwork, the Kristoff part of the story is passable… but the elephant in the room for the second part of the Englehart run is Hawkeye being mad at his wife for murdering the cowboy who raped her during a time travel storyline. And yes, it’s even more awkward than it sounds.
Was ANYONE reading this enjoying this plot?
Can we cut to something more grounded? Like an Egyptian god leaving the body of Moon Knight to spring him out of jail?
Man, stuff like this is why I love comics. Even a crappy one like this… you have to respect the insanity.
Kristoff is Doom enough to accept without question that he’s dealing with a god.
Doom agrees to free the Avengers because, in order to prove that he doesn’t answer to anyone, he decides to do exactly what the god wants from him.
What kind of sense does THAT make!? I swear I didn’t skip a single part of their dialogue!!!
What do you think, Doctor Doom from Fantastic Four #247?
Sounds legit. I guess Kristoff is Doom after all.
Even when he agrees to free the Avengers, though, there is still one thing Kristoff wants to settle… Quicksilver is there too.
And since Quicksilver didn’t exactly treat Kristoff well in Fantastic Four #305, he does perhaps the only smart thing he’s ever done since Englehart started writing him.
Do you ever get the feeling that Englehart doesn’t really like Quicksilver?
The Avengers show up to fight Kristoff (they don’t know he’s agreed to let them go), inadvertently saving Quicksilver, and Kristoff is just done with this whole thing.
God does this part of the run suck…
Doom significance: 0/10
It’s a 0/10 on the KRISTOFF scale. Let that sink in.
Silver Age-ness: 10/10
On the Marvel scale, sure, but it has a child-sized Doctor Doom fighting an Egyptian god!
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
The whole plot with Hawkeye and Mockingbird deserves a negative score as a whole, but it’s inconsequential in this single issue.