THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD 113 (1974)
by Bob Haney & Jim Aparo
cover by… lots of people
This being an anthology, the cover artwork is by *deep breath* Jim Aparo, George Papp, Joe Kubert and Tatjana Wook (Wally Wood’s wife).
Here’s the part of the cover relevant to Batman. Why couldn’t they just have this on the cover? Not that the rest of the images are bad, quite the contrary, but you can barely see them!
We begin with Commissioner Gordon being fired for being too old. Well it HAS been 35 years since the first Batman story, he deserve some rest!
Surprisingly enough, Batman agrees that Gordon is too old. I would’ve guessed he’d be one wishing to keep him!
Yes, Batman, they’re definitely going to make a masked vigilante the new commissioner. What do you think this is, the Silver Age? It’s 1974, things are not that ridiculous anymore! That’d be like having the city forcing Batman to retire!
I WAS KIDDING!!!
Come on!!! Why does Batman listen to these guys!? That’s so dumb that I can forgive Batman for thinking he’s the only superhero around.
I mean the are TONS of other heroes that are just as good as he is! As long as they don’t pick…
No, really, the Metal Men’s reputation is SO great that they actually replace Batman!!!
Oh, wait. I didn’t realize you were serious about the Metal Men being great superheroes.
That calls for a different meme.
Then the entire Wayne Enterprises building is taken hostage, Bruce Wayne included. The bad guys are going to kill everyone with poison gas if they don’t get the money.
See, THIS is why making the relationship between Batman and Wayne at any level is dangerous.
It also goes to show how, at this time, Bruce Wayne is far from the richest man in the world.
27.4 million dollars in 1974 would be 164.68 million dollars today. Nothing to sneeze at of course, but for a comparison J. Paul Getty (who by a quick research was probably the richest man in the world in 1974, but don’t quote me on that) was worth 6 billion dollars.
And it’s EXPLICITLY what the ENTIRE Wayne Enterprises are worth.
What do you mean you were “forced” to retire!? You just went along with it without fighting it!!!
Metal Men to the rescue! Now that’s not something I write every day.
That almost qualifies as your catchphrase, Mercury, but not quite.
Ah, now that’s the Metal Men I recognize: morons.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: YOU GUYS SUCK.
And naturally the police is already completely lost, having to call back Commissioner Gordon.
WTF is going on!?!? Was Batman SERIOUSLY not doing anything because he didn’t have the police’s permission!?!?!
Well at least we get some great Jim Aparo artwork out of it. He’s one of the best Batman artists of all time, so obviously he delivers.
Even though it’s completely pointless: Batman can’t find the poison gas, so he has to change back into Bruce Wayne and… basically surrender?
So let me get this straight… Commissioner Gordon’s plan was:
1) call Batman
2) if that doesn’t work, just pay the ransom
Yeah I kind of get why they were forcing him to retire!
The bad guys get the money but for some reason decide to just tie up Wayne instead of killing him.
However the fact that the Y in the logo doesn’t light up is apparently a big clue.
Behold the Metal Men at their most useful throughout the entire story!
Uh. This might be the first time when the Metal Men don’t get a scratch and someone else gets seriously wounded.
Even Batman can’t make the “Whirlybat” look or sound cool.
So… I’m no expert on these things, but do those giant neon signs really hold enough gas to murder an entire skyscraper if you replace it with poison?
The issue also includes an autobiography by Bob Haney which includes a picture, so here’s how he looked in 1974.
Jim Aparo also has his autobiography, but aptly enough he provides a drawing instead of a picture.
Metal Men significance: 0/10
Completely forgotten. I’m not a huge expert on Batman continuity but I’m fairly certain Commissioner Gordon lives and continues his job… much to Batman’s disappointment, apparently!
Silver Age-ness: 8/10
The Metal Men are considered better heroes than Batman. THE METAL MEN.
Does it stand the test of time? 4/10
What a mess. Haney is a better writer than this; the final twist is good, I’ll give him that, but the rest of the story is utterly ludicrous. And the Metal Men were completely superfluous! I’m half convinced the only reason we’re here is Tina has the hots for Batman.
The fantastic Jim Aparo artwork really, REALLY helps… but don’t think too much about the plot.
Should this have been part of the main series?
Kinda? The plot is not crazier than what the Metal Men were up to before their series went into reprints. If the Metal Men acted like this once the series re-started, though, it would still have been canceled.
Issues when not a single Metal Man dies: 25