SUPERMAN’S PAL JIMMY OLSEN 031 (1958)
By Otto Binder & Curt Swan
I think we just discovered why superheroes with stretchy powers wear special costumes… when they don’t, it’s horrifying!!!
We start with Superman bringing yet another souvenir to Jimmy… a mysterious treasure chest.
Superman has to leave to deal with a plane crash, so Jimmy opens the chest in his absence: it seems to contain Kryptonite. Of course.
I’m sure it’s in good hands, right?
However the effects on Jimmy are quite different from those of Kryptonite.
Naturally, Jimmy is quite scared by this, so he tests the effects by TWISTING HIS OWN ARM INTO A KNOT.
Why would THAT be the first thing you try!?
Jimmy escapes from the Daily Planet because he doesn’t want Superman to see him like this.
That’s when we discover that the citizens of Metropolis are dicks.
Is it just me or there’s something wrong with the proportions of that kid’s bike?
Anyway, that’s all it takes for Jimmy to decide that he can’t keep a normal life and that his only choice is to join a freakshow.
Where did that come from!? Jimmy’s been transformed in weird ways multiple times before!
He went to work when he was turned into a gorilla but THIS is where he draws the line!?
Jimmy gets a job immediately, and his new boss can immediately give him a costume that stretches like him.
Was there a sale of Unstable Molecules ™ or what!?
In a surprisingly smart moment, not only someone from the crowd immediately recognizes Jimmy because he’s nationally famous at this point, BUT they are not surprised in the slightest to see him with superpowers!
About time! Remember: every time Jimmy gets superpowers, he writes an article about it. And it typically ends up on the front page of the Daily Planet. OF COURSE people have started to notice!
Also, the criminal discovers that Jimmy is looking for a cure… by randomly chugging pills.
Sounds legit. I’m sure ingesting all kinds of random pills is great for your health.
The criminal lies to Jimmy pretending to be a famous scientist that has discovered the cure for Jimmy’s condition.
I’m not faulting Jimmy because he falls for this… he meets one of these random scientists every other issue!
The “professor” asks a simple favor from Elastic Lad: help a window cleaner they come across to clean a window that he can’t reach with his ladder.
Except the window cleaner is one of his accomplices and the window he’s helping clean belongs to the District Attorney’s office.
And why go through all this trouble to have Jimmy clean a window? Because he wasn’t using water… he was using ACID.
An acid that eats through bulletproof glass but doesn’t do anything to Jimmy’s hand.
Superman stops the bullet before it can kill anyone.
He’s got a great point… it’s pretty clear that Superman patrols Metropolis constantly, why would anyone still try to commit this kind of crime in his city?
But that was only part of the criminal scheme. The “professor” also dupes Jimmy into helping him dispose of a bomb.
The bomb blows a hole into a bank (how accurate is the crook’s aim!?!?), but Superman prevents the robbery by rebuilding the wall so fast that the criminals bump into it.
Okay Supes, now you’re just showing off.
The fake professor then tricks Jimmy into opening the door to the laboratory of the real professor.
And what’s the treasure inside that the criminal mastermind has been looking for?
Kryptonite!
Did he HAVE to go through all this trouble just for some Kryptonite? This is the Silver Age, you can pick up the stuff anywhere!
The criminal is so lame that Elastic Lad is able to stop him with extreme ease.
And finally, because we are at the last page by sheer coincidence it turns out that the real professor had the antidote all along… somehow.
Historical significance: 6/10
Elastic Lad is by far Jimmy’s most frequently used “secret” identity. It pops up even in the Legion stories, as you will see rather soon.
The only change will be the color of his costume, from green to purple.
Silver Age-ness: 6/10
Convenient Kryptonite that does something completely random? Check. Extremely easy superpowers? Check.
Does it stand the test of time? 4/10
There’s SOME potential with Jimmy feeling he’s a freak that doesn’t belong in society… but it comes out of nowhere and they don’t do anything with it.
Isn’t he supposed to be a journalist?
Jimmy is remarkably quick to abandon his career to join the freakshow!
Kryptonite, baby
Twice. Silver Age style with the Kryptonite inside the space chest, and a relatively more modern version that is so rare that obtaining it is the goal of an entire scheme.
Stupid Jimmy Olsen moment
Plenty of choices! From dousing himself with Kryptonite to falling for every trick of the fake professor… like I said I can forgive him for believing it’s a real professor, but they just stumble on a time bomb and Jimmy doesn’t find it suspicious?
But I’m going with his idea that being Element Lad is a curse. I could understand if he had serious troubles controlling this power, but after the first couple of panels he seems to be perfectly fine.
Superpower count: 17
Adding elasticity to the list.