Lois Lane – Page 17 – Comics Archeology

LOIS LANE #124 (1972)
by Cary Bates & John Rosenberger
Cover by Bob Oksner

Please don’t do anything racist please don’t do anything racist please don’t do anything racist…

Well we begin with Tarzan robbing a bank, so we’re definitely off to a good start.

Lois tries to call the police on this, only to be trapped and almost drowned inside a phone booth.

I have a hunch this would not work. How is the fire hydrant filling the booth if the hole is that big? Also I doubt the booth would be able to keep that much water without breaking or at the very least leaking.

How is she not cooked alive after this!?

In a previous issue a super-computer named K.A.R.L. predicted the future crimes of The 100, and it’s exactly as stupid as it sounds.
I do like the fact that Lois has to take the water out of her skirt… but her hair is perfectly dry.

Told you the new Lois roommates would just be stereotypes.

I need to remind you that, especially in the Thorn series, The 100 are supposed to be a cutthroat criminal organization.
Which, according to Cary Bates, means elephant accomplices.

“We need a getaway, something the police wouldn’t be able to find easily”
“I’ve got it: underground elephant tunnels!”

But then K.A.R.L. escapes custody (???) and hides in the “Metro Jungle”.

At first I thought this referred to some kind of giant jungle-themed zoo in Metropolis, but then THIS happens:

Yep. We are really doing this!

These two f##king idiots deserve each other.

Either Lois is into some kinky stuff, or Cary Bates is, or both.
Probably both.

You might think this makes no sense: if Lois has the mind of a ruthless jungle queen, why would she care about money?
But we have a brainwashed Superman barking like a dog, so we left logic behind us.

OR DID WE?

Okay, credit where credit is due, I didn’t anticipate Superman was faking it.
Or that Lois was as well!

That almost makes up for the fact that K.A.R.L. was just a decoy. ALMOST.

Historical significance: 0/10

Silver Age-ness: 10/10

Does it stand the test of time? 1/10
Saved from a 0/10 because for once Lois is not a complete idiot and Superman is not incompetent… but the story is far too idiotic to go above that.

Stupid Lois Lane moment
Despite how stupid the story is… and believe me, it’s gloriously stupid… Lois is surprisingly level-headed this time.

Interesting letters: this is a weird one.
In addition to the regular letters page, there is a second one signed by a “Mystery Columnist” that goes by the name of “Alexander (the Great)”. And he is… uhm… a bit different in his responses.