Random thoughts: DC movies

While this is primarily a site about superhero comics, there’s nothing that says I can’t talk about adaptations of superhero comics.

So let’s do ranking of the DC movies, with a few rules.

A) I will be ranking them on three criteria: how good it was as a movie, how good it was as an adaptation, and how much entertaining it was to me. Think of the latter as the “so bad it’s good” category, which is VERY useful for most of these.
The “total score” will be the some of those three, on a 0-10 scale.
B) No animated movies. Mostly because I haven’t seen A LOT of those.
C) None of the ones that started out as a serial and were later released as a movie. I’ve seen some of those and I don’t think they can be judged by the same criteria of a full movie.

Also, the following movies are not included in the list because I just haven’t seen them yet.

  • Swamp Thing (1982)
  • The Return Of Swamp Thing (1989)
  • Jonah Hex (2010)
  • Birds Of Prey (2020)
  • Zack Snyder’s Justice League (2021)
  • The Flash (2023)
  • Blue Beetle (2023)

And if at the end of this post you think my taste in movies is trash… why do you think I review comics instead of movies?


SUPERMAN

Superman And The Mole Men (1951)
Yes it feels like a serial and it’s basically a backdoor pilot for the George Reeves TV series, but it WAS released as a full movie so it counts.

Movie score: 3/10
Adaptation score: 5/10
Entertainment score:  2/10
Total score: 3.3/10
Yeah it’s not very good. It lacks the charm of the TV series (which is WAY better) and it’s quite boring for a long stretch of the runtime. An interesting time capsule just if you’re into the history of comics and/or of 50s cinema.


Superman (1978)
Would we even HAVE superhero movies without this one?

Movie score: 10/10
Adaptation score: 9/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 9.6/10
Still the gold standard for Superman. Doesn’t quite get the top score in everything because Lex Luthor is a terrible adaptation… but damn is this a good movie. No wonder it’s still the blueprint for Superman adaptations.
Also I consider the scene with Superman’s reaction to the death of Pa Kent to still be THE best scene in a superhero movie.


Superman II (1980)
It’s kind of weird to consider it a separate movie from the first; not only they were filmed together, they feel like a single movie.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 9/10
Entertainment score: 9/10
Total score: 8.6/30
Slightly better than the first movie in terms of actions, but it doesn’t hit the same emotional chords. Superman is still great, Lex still sucks, and without this movie we wouldn’t give any attention to General Zod.


Superman III (1983)
I can’t think of another superhero movie more confused about what it’s supposed to be.

Movie score: 1/10
Adaptation score: 5/10
Entertainment score: 4/10
Total score: 3.3/10
The movie that does the impossible: making Richard Pryor unfunny.
The movie grids to a halt whenever he shows up and he seems to take every possible chance to avoid provoking even the slightest chuckle. The only entertaining parts are those with Evil Superman, but even Christopher Reeves can’t save this one… it’s a boring embarrassment.


Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987)
Now this is a FUNNY embarrassment. There’s a difference.

Movie score: 3/10
Adaptation score: 5/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 5.3/10
We are definitely in “so bad it’s hilarious” territory here. Sure, as a movie it’s absolute trash, but as a source of unintentional comedy? *chef’s kiss*


Superman Returns (2006)
Sometimes I feel like I’m the only person who liked this movie.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 9/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 9/10
Lex Luthor is the only blemish on the adaptation score, but Kevin Spacey’s version is WAY better than Gene Hackman. Brandon Routh is no Christopher Reeves, but I liked his interpretation.
The action is great, the plot makes WAY more sense than the first two movies… I don’t know what people were expecting.


Man Of Steel (2013)
I don’t think I have ever hated a movie more than this one.

Movie score: 1/10
Adaptation score: -10/10
Entertainment score: 3/10
Total score: -2/10
This the polar opposite of what Superman stands for, and the fact that there are so-called Superman fans defending it makes me question humanity.
At least Lois Lane is pretty cool and the action is fine if you’re into destruction porn.


BATMAN

Batman (1966)
This one most definitely IS based on the TV show, but it was released as its own movie.

Movie score: 2/10
Adaptation score: 1/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 4/10
I’m not the biggest fan of the TV series. In fact, I can’t stand most of it. That being said, this movie is hilarious and COMPLETELY INSANE.


Batman (1989)
It’s easier to find Batman media NOT influenced by this one than the other way around.

Movie score: 10/10
Adaptation score: 8/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 9.3/10
No perfect score by changing the lore; I could excuse everything because it gets the vibe SO well, but making the Joker the killer of Batman’s parents is too much for me.
I’m also one of the few who doesn’t really buy Michael Keaton’s interpretation of Bruce Wayne, although his Batman is great.


Batman Returns (1992)
You can blame this one for the trend of adding more and more villains to the sequel.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 7/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 8.3/10
Where the first movie was “Batman with a Tim Burton touch”, this one feels like “Tim Burton with a touch of Batman”. In terms of adaptation, Batman himself is slightly closer to the comics… but Catwoman goes in a completely different direction, and I don’t know WTF he was thinking with Penguin.
Still a good movie and still a blast, though.


Batman Forever (1995)
Talk about a wild change in direction!

Movie score: 6/10
Adaptation score: 4/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 6/10
Controversial opinion, but I think Val Kilmer plays a good Bruce Wayne. He’s just stuck in a movie that is not exactly well-written.
Two-Face and Riddler have only a surface-level resemblance to their comic book counterparts, but Jim Carrey’s enthusiasm makes it entertaining enough.


Batman & Robin (1997)
Put this one in ice. Forever.

Movie score: 1/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 7/10
Total score: 2.6/10
Yeah I can’t defend this one. It’s not even as entertaining as the predecessor because a lot of scenes reeeeeally drag.


Batman Begins (2005)
The movie that ensured Batman superfans would be even more insufferable than they already are.

Movie score: 10/10
Adaptation score: 10/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 9.3/10
That being said… yeah it’s a masterpiece. I’m not even detracting points for changing Ra’s Al Ghul’s origin, because technically speaking it’s STILL compatible.
However I simply cannot take Batman seriously with that voice. Whenever he’s supposed to sound threatening, I laugh.


The Dark Knight (2008)
As if the Batman superfans were not ALREADY insufferable with the first one.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 10/10
Entertainment score: 7/10
Total score: 8.3/10
Unpopular opinion: if it wasn’t for the Joker, this would just be an okay movie. I found Batman and especially Bruce Wayne to be BY FAR the weakest part of the movie.
That being said… while the movie thinks it’s clever than it actually is, Heath Ledger and Aaron Eckhart are enough to elevate the weakest parts.


The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
If you thought I was too harsh on The Dark Knight… I think this one genuinely sucks.

Movie score: 6/10
Adaptation score: 5/10
Entertainment score: 3/10
Total score: 4.6/10
The only reason it’s not a trainwreck is that it’s made by a good director. But because the previous ones were good, this one gets a pass for stuff that would be mercilessly mocked everywhere else.
Forget Bane’s goofy voice (which is even more hilarious than Batman’s): this is a movie where the city sends THE ENTIRE POLICE DEPARTMENT into the sewers, where they stay isolated for months.


The Batman (2022)
That’s the year and not the running time. Easy mistake to make, it does feel like 20 hours and 22 minutes at times.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 7/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 7.6/10
This would be higher if it wasn’t so freaking long. Not because of the runtime, but because basically every single scene drags on 30 seconds longer than it should… and at the end you’re begging for the movie to finally end!
It might sound strange, but despite that I still think this is a good movie. Batman himself is relatively accurate (I think he does more detective work in this one than in all previous movies combined), plus the Penguin and Catwoman are great. Too bad Riddler has nothing to do with the character.
Bonus: not only it has the best Batmobile chase ever, it might have the best car chase scene ever.


WONDER WOMAN

Wonder Woman (2017)
This movie has absolutely no business being this good. None whatsoever.

Movie score: 9/10
Adaptation score: 8/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 9/10
The “No Man’s Land” scene remains one of the top five scenes in a superhero movie. A lackluster finale, that I think isn’t even as bad as people seem to think it is, is its only blemish.


Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
This movie has absolutely no business being this bad. None whatsoever.

Movie score: 3/10
Adaptation score: 6/10
Entertainment score: 6/10
Total score: 4/10
Pedro Pascal’s performance is the only saving grace of this movie. Is there a cut where he’s the only character? Because I’d watch THAT movie again!


AQUAMAN

Aquaman (2018)
Another movie that has no business being as good as it is. And it’s not even a masterpiece.

Movie score: 7/10
Adaptation score: 8/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 7.6/10
I’m not the biggest Aquaman fan, but if you’re coming from the Peter David era of the character this doesn’t seem to be a bad adaptation.


Aquaman And The Lost Kingdom (2023)
The DCEU ends in a meh.

Movie score: 5/10
Adaptation score: 7/10
Entertainment score: 6/10
Total score: 6/10
The first one was saved by a good plot, good chemistry between characters, and Jason Momoa’s charisma.
This one has a nonsense plot, zero chemistry between everyone except Patrick Wilson and Momoa, who in half of the scenes is not even trying.


SHAZAM

Shazam! (2019)
Holy Moly was this a pleasant surprise.

Movie score: 9/10
Adaptation score: 7/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 8.6/10
This is mostly adapting the most recent version of Shazam, of course. But having him keep the mind of Billy Batson even when he’s in Captain Marvel form is still different enough from decades of legacy that it hurts the score. But at least they give Billy a personality, something that is not always guaranteed with the character.
And for all the jokes, I still think that the scene where Billy confronts his mother makes this movie WAY more adult that all the edgelord tryhard Snyder movies.


Black Adam (2022)
They should hold classes on how NOT to write a movie, and this one should be its main thesis.

Movie score: 0/10
Adaptation score: 1/10
Entertainment score: 9/10
Total score: 3.3/10
Doctor Fate is the only character with a slight resemblance to his comic book counterpart.
This is a really bad movie, and a really DUMB movie.
You will laugh the entire runtime at how bad and how dumb it is.


Shazam! Fury Of The Gods (2023)
Even Shazam doesn’t seem convinced on the poster.

Movie score: 7/10
Adaptation score: 6/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 7/10
It doesn’t hold a candle to the original, and it retreads way too many points of the first one. Perhaps I’m too kind because I saw this one after Black Adam, but it’s passable.


SOLO HEROES

Supergirl (1984)
Forget Crisis, this is what killed Supergirl for decades.

Movie score: 2/10
Adaptation score: 2/10
Entertainment score: 5/10
Total score: 3/10
This is a fascinating trainwreck, but a trainwreck nonetheless. There is some enjoyment from the “so bad it’s good” perspective… what else can you expect from a movie whose premise is having the heroine search for a lost artifact that could destroy her planet if she fails… and then she FORGETS ALL ABOUT IT FOR THE REST OF THE MOVIE?


Steel (1997)
Another one who is not convinced on the poster. Or who can’t act.

Movie score: 1/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 7/10
Total score: 2.6/10
It’s badly written, INCREDIBLY badly acted, and it looks like it had less of a budget than the 1940s serials. But if you’re in the right state of mind, this movie is absolutely hilarious.


Catwoman (2004)
Its terrrrrrible.

Movie score: 0/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 7/10
Total score: 2.3/10
It has absolutely nothing to do with Catwoman, sure, but it’s one of the most incompetent movies you will ever see and the director had the good sense to never direct another movie after this one.
Still a riot to laugh at.


Constantine (2005)
Controversial opinion: I like this movie! If only they called it something else, instead of a title character that is completely different from the source material, it would be a classic.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 6/10
I’m serious, call this one ANYTHING ELSE and it’s a very solid movie. As a Constantine adaptation, it’s absolutely dreadful.


Watchmen (2009)
Weird to count it as a “solo movie”, but it’s not part of a larger franchise.

Movie score: 8/10
Adaptation score: 7/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 8.3/10
Snyder completely misreads the fact that YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ROOT FOR RORSHACH, sure, and misunderstands the idea behind the violent parts of the source material.
That being said, I have to admit that he did manage to adapt a comic that was widely considered (by myself included) to be impossible to adapt.
It looks worse than it is because you’re comparing it to a masterpiece, but on it’s own it’s a good movie.


Green Lantern (2011)
You’ll believe a franchise can flop.

Movie score: 4/10
Adaptation score: 2/10
Entertainment score: 7/10
Total score: 4.3/10
This movie wants to be Iron Man so badly it’s embarrassing. Starting the trend of DC movies trying to launch a franchise before delivering a good movie… and while some critics have perhaps been a bit too harsh, this is definitely NOT a good movie.
Entertaining to make fun of? Sure.
If only they had taken their time, maaaaybe it could have worked. But it jumped the gun trying to introduce too much stuff too quickly.
Hey, at least Kilowog was alright.


Joker (2019)
Why should Batman fans be the only ones allowed to be insufferable?

Movie score: 10/10
Adaptation score: 1/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 7/10
It’s overrated by people who think this is the best movie ever made. It’s under-rated by people who find those insufferable. It’s nothing really new to people who have actually seen Taxi Driver.
And it’s terrible in so many ways as an adaptation.
Despite having all of THAT against it… it’s still one hell of a movie.


TEAM-UP MOVIES

 Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
Also known as “Batman v Superman: nobody wins”.

Movie score: 0/10
Adaptation score: -5/10
Entertainment score: 5/10
Total score: 0/10
This one manages to be even worse than Man Of Steel for being the opposite of what both Superman AND Batman stand for! Wonder Woman is the only SLIGHTLY redeeming quality, but even she can’t balance this one.


Suicide Squad (2016)
With a title like that, you’re tempting fate.

Movie score: 2/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 3.3/10
“Everything that could possibly go wrong in a production: The Movie”.
But as an unintentional comedy this is hilarious! I don’t mind watching this again to laugh about how incompetent it is at everything it tries to do.


Justice League (2017)
The tagline “You can’t save the world alone” is missing its conclusion: “And neither can we”.

Movie score: 6/10
Adaptation score: 0/10
Entertainment score: 8/10
Total score: 4.6/10
Most of it a middle-of-the-road superhero movie that nobody would pay attention to… if it wasn’t about some of the most important superheroes ever.
Wonder Woman is fine, Aquaman is passable and Batman is WAY better than his previous trainwrecks. But Cyborg is left with nothing to do and the Flash… I still don’t understand what the heck were they thinking with the Flash.
Plus, as much as Marvel gets criticized for having weak villains: who would pick Steppenwolf as the first JLA villain???


The Suicide Squad (2021)
Also known as “the good one”.

Movie score: 10/10
Adaptation score: 4/10
Entertainment score: 10/10
Total score: 8/10
This is why you hire James Gunn. You might get stuff wildly different from the source material, but he’ll give you something very entertaining, very moving, and very well-directed.


This results in the following Top Threes:

SUPERMAN
1) Superman (1978): 9.6/10
2) Superman Returns (2006): 9/10
3) Superman II (1980): 8.6/10

BATMAN
1) tie, Batman (1989) and Batman Begins (2005): 9.3/10
2) tie, Batman Returns (1992) and The Dark Knight (2008): 8.3/10
3) The Batman (2022): 7.6/10

SOLO HEROES
1) Wonder Woman (2017): 9/10
2) Shazam! (2019): 8.6/10
3) Watchmen (2009): 8.3/10

TEAM-UP MOVIES
1) The Suicide Squad (2021): 8/10
2) Justice League (2017): 4.6/10
3) Suicide Squad (2016): 3.3/10


And as a whole…

ALL TIME HIGH
1) Superman (1978): 9.6/10
2) Wonder Woman (2017): 9/10
3) tie, Batman (1989) and Batman Begins (2005): 8.3/10

ALL TIME LOW
3) Catwoman (2004): 2.3/10
2) Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016): 0/10
1) Man Of Steel (2013): -2/10