WHAT IF? vol.2 #11 (1990)
by Jim Valentino
We have already seen what happens if the Fantastic Four had gained completely different powers… but what if they all got the same power?
Oddly enough the Watcher begins referencing that story, as well as other previous Fantastic Four What Ifs, including the very first one (“What if Spider-Man joined the FF”).
“What If… The Fantastic Four all had the same power as Human Torch?”
The problem with the premise is that you risk making everyone look the same. While I’m not the biggest Jim Valentino fan, I have to admit the solution is fine: he’s using the various ways the Torch’s power has been depicted over the years.
It’s also fun to see the classic covers with the members swapped with the Torch.
We also see their fight with the Miracle Man. Originally that was the debut of the Fantasticar, but since in this reality they can all fly I guess Reed never gets around to invent it.
Unfortunately the four go overboard in the fight and they end up BURNING A CHILD ALIVE.
Susan end up becoming a nun (WTF!?), Johnny a race car driver, and Reed pretty much stays the same.
However since in this reality Johnny never ran away it means he never found Namor, which means Captain America was never rescued… which means Ben Grimm became a founding Avenger.
That’s a neat connection, but I would’ve skipped the child burning alive thing.
Next!
“What If… The Fantastic Four all had the stretching power of Mister Fantastic?”
Susan’s first worry is about the effects this will have on her children (how very 60s Susan of her).
The dialogue says “this is great”, but Johnny’s face says “please kill me now”.
Susan is embarrassed by her powers (contrast with her “Ultra Woman” counterpart)…
…while Johnny is Johnny.
So since both Susan and Ben found the powers ridiculous they marry, ending up together thanks to their mutual love of being invisible.
Because that’s clearly something Ben Grimm would cherish. You know, the war hero astronaut football star.
Reed is, once again, exactly the same. I guess it makes sense, considering his powers are not a very big part of his character. And in this reality even that doesn’t change.
Hilariously, Johnny is the one to take the name Mister Fantastic. Come to think of it, the name suits his personality a lot more than it does Reed’s!
So… yeah. If everyone has fire powers we get child murder, if everyone has elastic powers everyone ends up happy. Who would’ve thought?
Next!
“What If… The Fantastic Four had all become monsters like the Thing?”
Note that it’s not “what if everyone became the Thing”, it’s if everyone became LIKE the Thing.
Specifically, Reed becomes an ape-like monster.
It’s probably a reference to another alternate version of Reed, calling himself the Brute, although this one has a slightly different look.
Johnny is the one who becomes the most Thing-like (aside from Ben).
And Susan becomes… Man-Thing? WTF!?!?
Yeah this is definitely Man-Thing! His actual origin is ridiculously complicated, but it has absolutely NOTHING to do with radiation so WTF is going on!?!?
The four end up being chased as monsters because… well they ARE…
…and so they decide to spend the rest of their lives on Monster Isle, Mole Man’s base.
Susan Storm transformed into Woman-Thing. Now I have seen everything.
Next!
“What If… The Fantastic Four shared the powers of the Invisible Woman?”
Mercifully it’s not “the powers of early Invisible Girl” or everyone would be utterly useless.
We begin with Doctor Doom trapping the United Nations Headquarters under a giant net, thanks to his helicopter.
While it’s a surprisingly accurate replay of the first Doom story…
…why would you show a normal helicopter and not the awesome Shark-Faced Copter ™ !?!?
Doom is here because in this reality the Fantastic Four have joined S.H.I.E.L.D. (as spoiled by the cover).
Including the sixteen year old Johnny Storm!!!
Reed offers himself hostage. Interestingly, in this reality the team seems to have discovered the force field power much earlier. Possibly because Reed has it too?
There are other differences from the main timeline. Doom takes Reed to his castle in Latveria, not the replica in the US. And he’s not hiding the fact that he’s the ruler instead of waiting years before he reveals it.
He’s still Doctor Doom, though.
Hey this is cheating! The premise was giving the team the powers of Invisible Woman, but she can’t turn intangible!!!
Ben tries the old “use a force field to stop the oxygen supply”, but it’s kind of dumb against Doom.
You know classic Doom used to carry a gun, right? Well this is the 90s so he has a ridiculously humongous one!!!
Hey, maybe this was in continuity after all!!!
Doom is defeated by Ben’s force field blast…
…and Doom is arrested for the attack on the UN headquarters, since it’s not covered by his diplomatic immunity.
Yeah I’m sure that’s how it works.
And so we end with Nick Fury being Nick Fury.
Jim Valentino is both writer and penciler, but he does acknowledge who inspired the idea.
Did any of this show up in continuity?
Susan has worked very very briefly as a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent.
Silver Age-ness
Torch powers: 0/10
Even with the nun thing. What was up with that!?
Stretch powers: 6/10
Especially since this Johnny is basically Elongated Man.
Things: 10/10
WOMAN-THING. That is all.
Invisibility powers: 5/10
Just don’t think too hard about anything and it works.
Does it stand the test of time? 4/10
Well… that was a waste of an interesting premise.
The one with fire powers takes a sudden dark turn for no apparent reason other than shock value, and the monster one is by far the worst since it has basically nothing to do with the core premise. The invisibility one is passable, although the confusion about powers is confusing (I guess Reed gets invisibility and Ben gets the force field, but Susan also get invisibility and Johnny gets intangibility? What!?).
The only one I kind of enjoyed was the stretch powers one. The idea that both Susan and Ben immediately quit because stretchy powers are dumb is a very corny plot point, but if it’s supposed to be a Silver Age moment it almost works. At least it’s refreshing to have a story where things don’t go horribly wrong!
The artwork has some early 90s excesses, but overall it’s fine.