Uncanny X-Men #145

UNCANNY X-MEN #145 (1981)
Writer: Chris Claremont
Pencils: Dave Cockrum
cover by Dave Cockrum

Beginning a three-part storyline where Doctor Doom fights the X-Men for the first time, plus we have a chance to see the artwork of post-Legion Dave Cockrum.

We begin with Storm and her friend Stevie Hunter being ambushed Miss Locke, the henchwoman of X-Men villain Arcade.

 

Arcade worked with another X-Men villain, Toad, in an issue of Marvel Two-In-One where they used one of Doom’s castles as their base of operations.
And now Miss Locke wants the X-Men’s help to free Arcade, by kidnapping friends and family.

This being Claremont’s X-Men there are many, many, MANY subplots that I won’t cover because they’re not related to the Doom retrospective.

Beast is an Avenger now and he’s already faced Doom, so Professor Xavier contacts him to get some info. Weird to think that the X-Men don’t know enough about him already.

So OF COURSE Xavier doesn’t want the help of non-mutants.

Despite the offer to get help from the Avengers, Xavier decides to recruit Havok and Polaris who by this time had retired from being superheroes.

“Had I a choice”, Xavier? Like the AVENGERS!? What a jackass.

Recruiting Iceman makes SOME sense, since he wasn’t exactly retired (he was just in college).

I know I said I wouldn’t cover the subplots, but I can’t skip this one because it’s ridiculous: Xavier is having problems using his telepathic powers because Magneto is interfering magnetically!!!

WTF does that even mean!? Does telepathy work with radio waves now!?

Also: most of these people have never worked together before, and they can’t even use the Danger Room to train because it’s been damaged in a previous issue.

Feeling good about not calling the Avengers now, Charles?

And so we’re up to Castle Doom, the original one all the way back from Doom’s first story (and which apparently has been relocated on a mountain).

Storm knows how to make an entrance!

Although you really can’t beat Doom’s class.

I’m typically not a very big fan of the way Claremont writes dialogue, but I have to admit he captures Doom’s tone extremely well.

An interesting point is made about Doom needing to be careful not to be caught breaking the law now that he’s lost his diplomatic immunity.

Naturally they end up facing some robots designed to fight the Fantastic Four.

“We ain’t the F.F.” is not a badass boast, Wolverine.

Meanwhile Doom is hitting on Storm.

Weirdly enough, they’re both feeling a bit of attraction towards each other.

It turns out that Arcade isn’t Doom’s prisoner: he’s an ally.

Yeah, uhm, taking on Doctor Doom with no backup wasn’t the smartest plan ever.

That’s when Doom turns Storm into a statue. (!!!)

The other X-Men attack Doom, but he defeats them IN ONE PANEL.

But wait: Colossus is still standing! Will he be able to stop Doctor Doom?

Nope!

And so we end with the X-Men being defeated. But at least the Avengers are coming for backup, right Charles?

To be continued


Doom significance: 4/10
The storyline is overall somewhat significant, but you can skip the first part without missing much of anything. Doom’s fascination with Storm wil get a shout out after her marriage to Black Panther several years later.

 Silver Age-ness: 7/10
Doom turning Storm into a statue is VERY Silver Age, plus the whole idea to have Storm distract him while the rest of team sneaks into his castle. And let’s not forget magnetism affecting telepathy!

 Does it stand the test of time? 5/10
Doom himself is well-written; I don’t have complains there. My problem is with the X-Men… while they’re not as experienced as the Fantastic Four or the Avengers, they come off as complete amateurs here! And yes I’m STILL fixated on the fact that Xavier rejected the help from the Avengers for absolutely no freaking reason.
Even Dave Cockrum isn’t at the top of his game, his artwork was WAY better with the Legion.

It was a Doombot all along
There is no indication within this story, but this BY FAR the most famous storyline where it will be retroactively revealed that we’re dealing with a Doombot. More on that next issue.

 Destroy the FF! & Take over the world
Still no clue about what Doom wants from the X-Men, but it’s neither of those here.

Crazy tech
The Metabolic Transmuter ™ used to trap Storm will get the spotlight next issue, so I’m giving this to the Neural Disruptor ™: not only it’s a very cool weapon, Doom will one day use it to basically one-shot THE HULK.

 Number of superheroes who have fought Dr. Doom: 43
Adding Storm, Colossus, Wolverine and Nightcrawler. I’m also adding Angel: while he was present during Champions #16, he wasn’t included in the count since he didn’t actually fight Doom.