The Brave And The Bold #65 (1966)
by Bob Haney & Dick Giordano
cover by Bruno Premiani
DC Comics was seriously pushing the Doom Patrol, because after their team-up with the Challengers Of The Unknown they meet the Flash.
It’s also the first time the team is not written by its creator Arnold Drake.
We begin with Chief testing ways to make Robotman less vulnerable to magnets.
That’s an embarrassing way to meet your team’s leader.
Since this is the first time the Doom Patrol has a new writer, it’s only natural to examine the way their characters are portrayed more closely… and it’s not an improvement.
I’ve mentioned before how Elasti-Girl is not well integrated into the team’s motif: her only qualification for being “a freak” is having a superpower that is not debilitating.
Even if they added the fact that her powers could kill her at any moment… something that I don’t think has come into play since they introduced the idea… it still doesn’t fit.
ESPECIALLY when she compares her plight to the guy who DOESN’T HAVE A BODY!!!
Admittedly the artwork is great here, but COME ON!!!
Sorry but I’m 100% against Elasti-Girl this time.
I do agree that anyone deserves to blow off some steam, Negative Man, but complaining about having it rough in front of a guy who has suffered a fate millions of times worse than yours is taking it too far.
Credit where it’s due, but FOR ONCE Bob Haney seems to have done his homework: Elasti-Girl’s weakness when she shrinks HAS been a recurring problem.
“You have no weaknesses, Negative Man. Other than passing through lead and dying if you use your power for longer than 60 seconds”.
Also, I already have to take back my compliments to Bob Haney because Negative Man has shown PLENTY of other weaknesses… how many times has negatively (pun intended) affected by all sorts of things like radio signals or electricity?
Meanwhile, the Brotherhood of Evil is… uhm… being French?
More on the song soon, but they’re singing it to celebrate their new plan to destroy the Doom Patrol.
How can you not love the fact that THE TALKING GORILLA is the only member of this team making sense?
The Brotherhood’s headquarters is beneath Madame Rouge’s school for girls.
So the supervillain team is just singing an old traditional French song (although both the kids and the supervillains are singing it slightly wrong because it should be “l’on y dance”, not “on y dance”).
Which means that we have an immortal world conqueror, a shapeshifting superspy, a brain-in-a-jar and a talking gorilla singing “On the bridge of Avignon, they are dancing”.
And then “French Security” calls the Doom Patrol because they need their help to arrest a Nazi that is living “in a foreign city”.
So, uhm… France has no diplomatic relations with this unnamed country, but they’re asking Negative Man to bring him back to France to be arrested.
I’m assuming the United States doesn’t have diplomatic relations either.
My French is a little rusty but I believe this results in both an incident diplomatique and an idée idiote de Bob Haney.
So Negative Man goes to the city in “middle Europe” where they’re holding a funeral.
By the way, unless it’s a fictional country, this can only mean the scene is taking place in East Germany. Because there were only two European countries without diplomatic relations with France: East Germany and Albania, and I don’t think anyone would ever define Albania as “middle Europe”.
And then Negative Man, who I remind you can MOVE AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT, manages to be outmatched by a coffin.
Also: either that’s a very thin coffin or these are some strong pall bearer, considering it’s made of lead!!!
I should also point out that this Nazi collaborator of the Brotherhood is NOT General Zahl, the OTHER Nazi with a monocle that will become an important member of the team later.
Locking Negative Man’s energy body means killing Larry, so he’s put in suspended animation AGAIN.
Naturally the solution is making the Brotherhood believe their plan has failed.
This requires Chief to send a signal to disrupt the coffin’s Geiger counter, which is confirming the presence of Negative Man inside the coffin.
Which is accomplished thanks to the fact Chief was SOMEHOW aware of Larry’s thoughts? Uh?
And now, ladies and gentlemen, is when the story turns completely bonkers.
Yes.
NOW.
Because first our French-singing supervillains ask their alien ally to use his advanced technology…
…for advertisements.
And then Chief gets a call about some scientist being able to see a subatomic particle with his naked eyes. I’d be less impressed by his reaction time than the fact that HE CAN SEE IT.
And then, uhm… well, there’s no other way to put it: then Bob Haney happens.
This is SOMEHOW connected to the scientist with the best vision in history.
At this point you might be wondering: is there going be any Flash in this Flash team-up?
He’ll be our stand-in for Negative Man.
Good thing Chief has a costume that can make you look line a being composed of pure energy.
All just to take some pictures.
This means the Brotherhood is now convinced Negative Man was not captured.
Also, someone should REALLY clean The Brain’s tank.
I must once again stress how weird it is that THE TALKING GORILLA is the reasonable one.
One of the few occasions where General Immortus is the leader and not The Brain.
In the midst of this insanity, there is ONE good idea: the reason why people have gone crazy is that those “advertisements” were actually just subliminal messages.
But this is a Bob Haney story, so he has to tackle something insane after any good idea.
I have no idea what the heck ANYTHING of this has to do with the scientist with microscopic vision.And why the heck would Chief and The Brain be the only ones to know “the old Egyptian sign for evil”???
And based on Chief’s instruction, the United States destroys the satellite broadcasting the message.
You’d expect the story to be over, but then General Immortus decides to shoot Negative Man’s coffin into space.
They’re not entirely sure he’s in there, but what do they have to lose?
The Doom Patrol tries to rescue him, but their plane is captured by Garguax’s trick arrow.
So, uhm, why exactly don’t they give Chief a parachute?
I mean I get why Robotman doesn’t carry him on his arms… landing this way would certainly kill Chief… but I get the feeling Elasti-Girl or Flash could’ve done something!
Elasti-Girl has been using her ability to keep her limbs at different dimensions quite a bit, and it always looks ridiculous.
She can’t enlarge fast enough to catch the missile in time, so she hitches a ride on Flash’s shoulders.I know you should never ask a lady how much she weight, but… she HAS to weight more than the Flash should reasonably be capable of carrying, right?
With all that tension about whether to save Chief from the plane or not… the Brotherhood just brough him to their lair.
I can’t imagine why the Brotherhood took decades to become a legitimate threat.
But they do manage to escape without repercussions.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, the Flash was WAY more useful than the Challengers Of The Unknown. Even if it took him a while to join the story.
Historical significance: 1/10
Weirdly enough, this is the last encounter of the Doom Patrol with General Immortus during the initial run. The rest of the Brotherhood will return.
Silver Age-ness: 10/10
No, seriously, what was up with the scientist?
Does it stand the test of time? 6/10
It was pretty good until we got to the usual Bob Haney zaniness, if we ignore the abysmal Elasti-Girl characterization. Other than that, it’s the typical insanity helped by rather solid artwork and a clever idea here and there.
Times Robotman has been damaged: 15
Issues when Robotman is never damaged: 12
Ridiculous Flash feat of the day
