JIMMY OLSEN 72 (1963)
by Jerry Siegel and Curt Swan
Because nobody demanded it: this story is both in the Jimmy Olsen AND Legion retrospectives.
We begin with Jimmy as a guest on a TV show where he demonstrates all the weird transformations from his book. Apparently, superpowers are THAT mundane already.
His transformations, which he’s able to replicate because he carries around all the serums that caused them, range from Elastic Lad…
…to others that we have yet to see in the Jimmy retrospective, such as a wolfman…
…and Jimmy’s most iconic transformation BY FAR, Giant Turtle Man.
But the show is interrupted by an alien calling himself “the Collector”, who accuses Jimmy of committing crimes against his world and abducting him.
The Collector transports Jimmy to another world, where he creates duplicates of Jimmy’s past transformations…
…and immobilizes Jimmy so he can’t run away.
Jimmy’s torture ranges from having needles being shot at him to… watching a fat version of himself eat a lot (WTF?)…
…to being tickled (double WTF!?).
Superman DOES find Jimmy, but he refuses to save him because of reasons.
And what is Jimmy’s crime? Destroying the Collector’s world with his hypersonic signal watch.
Sounds legit.
Jimmy refuses to give up and tosses the microphone he was still carrying against the Collector…
…which is enough to deduce that the Collector is secretly Mon-El, because he dodged the microphone by force of habit.
Because nobody else would’ve dodged a lead microphone thrown at their head!?!?
All the “fake Jimmys” are Legionnaires, but they make relatively more sense.
They also brought with them… Proty II !?!?
Of for f#ck’s sake, we just got rid of the first one!!!
Superman was on the joke, obviously. But why, oh why would the Legion of Super-Heroes go through ALL this trouble for Jimmy Olsen!?!?
Because… they want him as an honorary member.
Well TECHNICALLY he joins as Elastic Lad.
But… WHY would they want him as a honorary member?
Ah yes, of course. It’s in recognition of the ZERO TIMES Jimmy Olsen has assisted them in a mission!
Guys, just admit that you owed Superman a favor… nepotism at its finest.
Historical significance: 0/10
You would think that being the honorary member of a super-team OR the fact that Jimmy can use a plethora of transformations with minimal prep time would be used again, but…
Legion significance: 4/10
I would absolutely LOVE to give this a 0/10… but while Elastic Lad will have almost zero impact on the Legion, unfortunately Proty II will be used waaaaay too many times.
Silver Age-ness: 10/10
Even a fake Giant Turtle Man immediately gets top grades for this category!
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
No story, no characterization, and the Legion’s decision to recruit Jimmy makes NO SENSE.
We are legion
11 active in this story: Mon-El, Colossal Boy, Chameleon Boy, Cosmic Boy, Bouncing Boy, Saturn Girl, Sun Boy, Shrinking Violet, Triplicate Girl, Lightning Lad (who must be glad THIS was his first mission after his resurrection!) and technically speaking Superboy.
9 not appearing but officially members
1 honorary member: Elastic Lad
How much Legion is too much?
With Jimmy Olsen as honorary member, the Legion currently includes 21 people.
We’re not adding anything to the “Jimmy Olsen superpowers count” since all the individual transformations will be seen in the main retrospective.