Jimmy Olsen 127

JIMMY OLSEN 127 (1970)
by Leo Dorfman & Curt Swan
cover by Curt Swan

This is one of the more famous “Superman is being a dick” covers, but what’s the actual story?

We begin with Jimmy doing a story for the Daily Planet about the slums of Metropolis, which are apparently populated by giant rats.

Terry will be our supporting character for the issue. I like her, if only because she introduced herself throwing a bottle at Jimmy.

As if you couldn’t tell, we’re REALLY in the 70s now. Even at DC.

If it turns out the rats are just an excuse and the traps are just to torture Jimmy, Terry is going to become my favorite DC character.

I know, I know, I shouldn’t make fun of Jimmy when FOR ONCE he’s actually doing this for a good cause…

…but to be fair, I’m not the only one s#itting on him.

Wait… what is this? Jimmy grows a spine AND Perry White grows a conscience!?

Jimmy rents an apartment in the slums, and witnesses first hand that the guy renting the place (nicknamed “Mr. Squeeze”) is just human garbage.

This is starting to look like a good comic. Quick Jimmy, do something unnecessarily stupid!

Well… that was incredibly reckless, but it was at least somewhat heroic. Okay Jimmy, you get to celebrate this time.

I think I’m going to be sick, and not for the usual Jimmy Olsen reasons.

Calling Superman might’ve been A LITTLE extreme, but admittedly I wouldn’t touch that think with a ten foot pole either.

Witnessing the way these people are treated, the greatest hero in the universe says “who gives a crap?”.

I just can’t say it enough times. Superman. Is. The. Worst.

Jimmy has managed to piss off the criminal mastermind behind Mr. Squeeze, who decides to teach him a lesson by… shaving his head. (WTF!?)

“And then there was that one time Jimmy Olsen got a haircut wearing a blond wig. True story!”

Jimmy tracks down the boss, who points out that Jimmy doesn’t have any proof that he was behind his kidnapping… except Jimmy is inexplicably smart this issue!

And so we end with all the problems of the slums being solved because one guy got arrested.

You know… I’ve reviewed stories where Jimmy turns into Pinocchio or where a man reverses an earthquake with karate or an alien space dog gets a sex change with radioactive rocks… but somehow THIS is the most unrealistic story I’ve ever covered.


Historical significance: 0/10
This is in a way a predecessor to Suicide Slum, the worst district of Metropolis that will be introduced years later, but with no reference to this story so it’s probably a coincidence.

Silver Age-ness: 1/10
Calling Superman to get rid of cockroaches, and of course the incredibly simplistic ending. But it’s still basic stuff, especially considering this series.

Does it stand the test of time? 7/10
All jokes aside, this is a surprisingly solid comic. I liked Perry White acknowledging that he couldn’t just print the story without consequences but still allowing Jimmy the leeway to continue the investigation, plus like I said Jimmy is surprisingly smart. That being said, there are a couple of things that would need to be adjusted… the criminals are cartoonishly nonviolent, the fairytale ending, and of course the fact that SUPERMAN IS JUST HORRIBLE HERE.
Also: the cover is a complete lie! Not only the scene doesn’t happen, the situation is actually kind of the opposite of what is being shown!

 Stupid Jimmy Olsen moment
If we trust Jimmy (normally I wouldn’t, but this time I might) he JUST bought that lunch box. How did it manage to get full of cockroaches? Unless the apartment is THAT full of them, in which case why would he even think about eating there!?

 

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