Kamandi #58

KAMANDI #58 (1978)
by Jack C. Harris & Dick Ayers
cover by Jim Sherman

Kamandi was one of the best Jack Kirby series at DC: while it didn’t have anywhere near the same impact of his Fourth World, in my opinion from a writing standpoint it was superior to nearly everything else.
Kirby lasted 38 issues doing both writing and pencils, plus a couple with pencils alone. The series limped all the way to #59 with various other creators, meaning that he will get cancelled the issue after a team-up with Karate Kid.
Coincidence?

This time the pencils are from Dick Ayers (who we have seen in the Human Torch serial), who draws a surprisingly feminine Kamandi.

He’s definitely an improvement over the pencils of previous Karate Kid issues, even though he seems to think karate mandates that you do karate hands all. The. Time.

Kamandi explains that the “movie” they are trapped in is actually a holographic simulation.

Except that if you don’t go against the script things are solid, as they discover once the scene is changed from a karate movie to a porno.

You think I’m kidding, don’t you?

You see, the lobster people are obsessed about 20th century movies and they want humans, who they consider gods, to play in them. Which makes no sense whatsoever, so Kamandi and Karate Kid decide they’re just… not going to do anything.

Our plot, ladies and gentlemen: so boring that even the protagonists refuse to have any part in it.

This makes the lobster people so angry that not only they kick the “actors” out of the movie…

…they SET THE PLACE ON FIRE.

At least the fire helps Red Alien Chick, Dog Sherlock Holmes and Topless Hippie Girl locate where Kamandi and Karate Kid are, and they take Diamondeth there.
Be honest, is any of these goofy nicknames worse than “Diamondeth”?

Red Alien Chick can either turn Diamondeth into Iris permanently, or she can send Karate Kid to his version of the 30th century.
And she can’t do both because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

To be fair, there IS an explanation. I can’t make heads or tails of it, but it’s there.

And so Kamandi has to say goodbye to Karate Kid, who he’s interacted with for like five minutes.

“Intelligent human”, sure, let’s go with that.

I do wonder if there were plans for a Legion counterpart of Kamandi to show up, though.

And that’s how the Karate Kid storyline ends! The only hanging thread is the Diamandeth transformation, but see below.

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Historical significance: 0/10

Silver Age-ness: 8/10

Does it stand the test of time? 0/10

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Bonus: so how DID the Diamondeth plot get fixed anyway?

Superboy and the LSH #246 (1978)
written by Paul Levitz & Len Wein
Pencils by Joe Staton

I will eventually make a proper review of the whole story, but here is the Karate Kid stuff.

The other Legionnaires were worried when they heard Karate Kid was in the hospital, but he was actually just bringing Iris there to be cured.

In my headcanon, the Legion reaction is a comment about how the team felt about Karate Kid’s ridiculous 20th century adventures and nothing will change my mind.

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Is it finally, FINALLY over!? Almost!
There is still one story that serves as an epilogue to the series (a Batman team-up, of all things) and then we’ll celebrate the true ending of this awful, awful series with the Karate Awards.