Metal Men #56

METAL MEN 56 (1978)
by Gerry Conway & Joe Staton
cover by Jim Aparo

Here we are: the last issue of the regular series. Not that you could tell from the cover.

Tina seems to have the hots for Gold again…

…and Lead has had enough of Mercury. CAN YOU BLAME HIM!?

Tin raises an interesting point. For some reason the Metal Men are not fully recognized as sentient beings, so are they still private property?

But that’ll have to wait because SUDDEN ROBOT!

I’m not adding him to the “elemental robots” count, by the way, because while he he has shapeshifting powers he’s not made of a single element like the rest.

“The Inheritor” is called back by Magnus, and Mercury continues his character development. Couldn’t you do this like fifty issues ago, Mercury!?

At least Doc didn’t INTENTIONALLY send a murder robot against his own creations. This time.

Whatshername is on the same page of the Metal Men. Apparently the legality of owning the Metal Men is still up for debate.

Once the Metal Men return to their apartment, they are greeted by General Caspar who claims the military owns them.

General, WTF did you think was going to happen!?

With no one else willing to fight for them, the Metal Men ask for Wonder Woman!
In-universe it doesn’t make much sense since they barely know her, but it’s obviously a homage to their creator Robert Kanigher who wrote Wondy for decades.

Wonder Woman works at the United Nations in her secret identity, and her lawyer friend suggests an “easy” solution: get the Metal Men declared Citizens Of The World!

Sounds legit.
Although there is SOME precedent in the DC Universe, where Superman (among others later) was declared a citizen of every single nation on the planet.

Also I have to wonder: why does EVERY fictional universe with racism against robots chooses “toaster” as a slur? Why is that THE appliance of choice every time?

Having Gold comparing the Metal Men’s situation to slavery is a bit on the nose, though.

That’s when The Inheritor attacks, making short work of the Metal Men.

Well… that’s ONE way to close a series, I suppose.


Metal Men significance: 0/10
The Metal Men will get better, of course, but this is the last appearance of The Inheritor.

Silver Age-ness: 4/10
Despite the more serious tone, Conway is still paying his respects to the intrinsic zaniness of the Metal Men.

Does it stand the test of time? 6/10
Quite abrupt, but you have to respect the novelty of kidding the entire team during…just kidding: MERCURY saves the day!!!

This might be the only time when Mercury is the only one that doesn’t die.

And that’s a wrap: with that display of heroism, the Metal Men are voted Citizens of the World and recognized as sentient beings.

Despite the uplifting ending, the series had been headed for cancellation for quite some time and was in the perfect spot to be caught by the so-called “DC Implosion” of 1978.

Before we can bid goodbye to the Metal Men, though, we still have a few appearance on other titles that I’ve skipped, and then we’ll catch up with their team-ups with other heroes following the cancellation. Mostly with Batman, for some reason.


Metal Men significance: 5/10
The Metal Men’s new status has surprisingly little impact on their post-cancellation appearances.

Silver Age-ness: 4/10
I wasn’t kidding.

 Does it stand the test of time? 8/10
Definitely a step down from the amazing previous issues: you can tell this was rushed. But the story still manages to give a proper (if abrupt) ending to the series, work in some action and characterization, and even a Kanigher homage by involving Wonder Woman.
It’s not without problems, though. General Caspar proves to be an idiot of the highest magnitude by ordering The Inheritor to brutally destroy the Metal Men while they are on the United Nations podium (!!!!). And Wonder Woman doesn’t make a great impression either, just standing around allowing almost all of the Metal Men to be killed. I get that she probably realizes they can be rebuilt, but still, by this point she had recovered her powers. 

Times Nameless has died: 5
Times Platinum has died: 19
Times Mercury has died: 20
Times Gold has died: 21
Times Tin has died: 25
Times Lead has died: 25
Times Iron has died: 25

 

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