Tales of the Legion #321-323

Tales of the Legion of Super-Heroes #321 (1985)
written by Mindy Newell
“plot assist” by Paul Levitz
pencils and cover by Dan Jurgens

This storyline takes over three whole issues. Good thing they didn’t split the book with half-length stories like they did in the earlier issues, because it’s already a slog with just three parts.
Two warnings: first, the scans are not of the usual quality.
Second, I’m not exactly a big fan of this one.

As you can imagine from the cover we’re going to follow Dawnstar, in her attempt to rescue the missing Legionnaire from the Orando mission. And she’s joined by Brainiac 5, who has recently enhanced her powers.

Unfortunately as soon as they arrive at a planet where they think they can rescue the Legionnaires, Brainiac 5 loses her signal and his ship stops working.

Not that Dawnstar is doing any better, because she’s taken down by the locals who shoot arrows at her. So how durable is she, exactly? We’ve seen her crash through spaceships and withstand more punishment, so I assumed she was more durable than humans.

We have a small interlude with Star Boy trying to cheer up Dream Girl by telling her she wasn’t such a bad leader, since she handled the Great Darkness Saga and the Legion of Super-Villains.
Now I’m willing to give her the the Great Darkness, but what exactly did she do against the LSV?

One of the reasons why I don’t care much for this storyline is that the fantasy planet where Dawnstar and Brainiac 5 have landed seems pretty boring to me. Especially given that we’re supposed to care for this Jhodan guy…

…and there’s some creepy undertones with his child apprentice falling for him.

Also, and I can’t emphasize this enough, Jhodan is an a-hole.

Well at least Brainiac 5 is there. He’s my favorite Legionnaire so he has to do something interesting, right?

Yeah, uhm… maybe it’s because he’s being written by Mindy Newell instead of Levitz, but… this is a rather boring Brainiac 5.

Having Brainy stranded on a “primitive” planet where his technology doesn’t work is a great idea, sure, but I prefer to give him more credit than this storyline.

I mean… Brainiac 5 not beign the physical type? Sure, I can buy that.
His body not being able to keep up with the environment? Especially since he’s probably been wounded? Sure.
But Brainiac 5 being unable to handle his own in a survival situation? Come on!

He has to be rescued by a space hippy.

Well at least Brainiac 5 can’t complain TOO much about his situation, because Dawnstar DEFINITELY has it worse.

You have to love Dawnstar’s no-nonsense approach to everything. The priestess showing up is just a kid? She evaluates kicking the kid!

Jhodan… NOBODY buys the idea that you’re sparing her for her “hidden gentleness”.
Just admit you think she’s hot.

And so begins the love triangle nobody asked for… between Dawnstar, Space KKK Guy and a child.

In other plots, we have the Saturn Girl wondering if she should return to active duty now that she’s had a baby. I have to wonder: did readers really consider the possibility that she would never return to active duty?

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Tales of the Legion of Super-Heroes #322 (1985)
written by Mindy Newell
“plot assist” by Paul Levitz
pencils and cover by Dan Jurgens

Jurgens is fine in these issues, nothing spectacular. But damn is that a great cover!!!

The situation is kind of reversed: now it’s Dawnstar who wants to save Brainiac 5.
And she’s stuck on the planet until her wings heal.

Did you think I was joking about this being a love triangle? Dawnstar is starting to fall for Jhodan, who I remind you she BARELY knows. And who is constantly spouting religious propaganda.

Brainy, it’s up to you to save this storyline. Do something!!!

Uh. Not exactly what I had in mind, but at least there’s some fanservice for the ladies.

Honestly, Jhodan is SO insufferable that at this point I’d rather have Brainiac 5 falling in love with the space hippy.

Yes. THIS GUY is less insufferable than Jhodan.

Of all storylines, THIS ONE got to be three issues long. What did I do to deserve this?

Jurgens is 100% trying to be George Perez here. Too bad he doesn’t have a good script, because it’s not a bad imitation.

Although I don’t think he has figured out how someone flies using wings, because WTF is this pose?

I’m not saying that this storyline consists of this sort of panel repeating itself over and over again, but it sure FEELS that way.

The Space Inquisition catches up with Jhodan, and Dawnstar “accidentally” stabs one of them.

A lot of the conflict in this storyline comes from the fact that these people have never seen an alien, and therefore think Dawnstar is a monster because of her wings.
So you’d expect that Brainy’s green skin would be a huge deal, but apparently all Dawnstar would’ve needed to avoid getting her wings impaled would’ve been Discount Lockjaw here.

Another thing you’d think would be treated differently: Dawnstar killing a guy.
The fact that is was an accident, or that at best it would’ve been considered self-defense, is not brought up. Not that would help her feel okay, but still.
Honestly I’m a bit too distracted by another point I didn’t mention: Dawnstar fell in love with Jhodan despite the fact she can’t understand a single word he’s saying.

Oh I’m sorry NOW, kid, believe me.

Yes Dawnstar, this is the place where you’ll be happy. With a guy you don’t understand, who belongs to a religion you know nothing about, surrounded by people who throw spears at you.
CLEARLY this is a better life than what would be with Wildfire.

Brainiac 5 finally manages to advance the plot SLIGHTLY…

…but the sort-of-cliffhanger is Dawnstar being worshipped now. Or is it Jhodan? I can’t bring myself to care either way.

Nothing particularly interesting happens to the other Legionnaires either.
Dream Girl complaining about her nails and her need for a hot bath might have been a quirky character moment the first five times, but when you reach the point where it’s all she seems to think about, we’re at parody levels now.

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Tales of the Legion of Super-Heroes #323 (1985)
written by Mindy Newell
“plot assist” by Paul Levitz
pencils and cover by Dan Jurgens

The cover propmises triumph and tragedy.
The tragedy is having to read this storyline.
The triumph is that it FINALLY ends.

This is where everyone’s plots converge. Unfortunately, this doesn’t result in Brainiac 5 punching Jhodan.

Yeah I’m just as baffled as you, Brainy.

We’re finally at the point where we learn WTF is the deal with this planet… kind of.
There’s also an interesting bit of Legion worldbuilding too: ever since Interlac was introduced, it wasn’t entirely clear what language they were speaking when Superboy and Supergirl were around.
If I get this right, the Legionnaires can understand 20th century English just fine.

Remember that computer reel Brainiac 5 discovered in the altar? It has the answers to this planet’s history, and he scolds Jhodan and his people for not even trying to study it.

You know what? I think I’m starting to actively dislike Dawnstar. If she keeps this up I’ll probably end up hating her.

Not that Brainiac 5 is much better in this storyline, mind you. Considering everything he knows, ESPECIALLY that there’s hidden technology on the planet… the idea that a tornado could hit a specific target is THAT unbelievable in the Legion universe!?
Also: we never get an official confirmation on whether this is a deliberate attack or not. Or even HOW these people might be controlling the weather.

Long story short… and I do mean LONG… the Space Inquisition attacks, and Dawnstar comes very close to killing one of the fanatics.

But she decides to spare the guy, even saving his life.

Everyone then gets captured and trapped inside this insanity.

God is Dawnstar INSUFFERABLE in this. Brainiac 5 is starting to solve a mystery, Dawny, not EVERYTHING can be a “let’s admire this beautiful culture” thing!!!

The reason why the two Legionnaires are hated… besides the wings and the green skin… is that they’ve unwillingly contaminated the locals with any number of future alien diseases.

So naturally Jhodan manages to convince the Space Inquisition to let them go, and EVERYONE is too stupid to notice the reel AGAIN.

And so the Legionnaire get back to Earth, where they get the confirmation that the planet was colonized by Earth people. And they get cured OFF-PANEL.

In other plots, Dev-Em has been extremely competent in his infiltration into the Dark Circle. So it’s about time for him to get captured.

But we truly close with the reunion between Dawnstar and Wildfire.

Yep. I knew this would be the result of this storyline… I freaking hate Dawnstar now.

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Legion significance: 0/10
After ALL THAT BUILDUP, we never see this freaking planet again.

Silver Age-ness: 0/10

Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
Oh boy. This might actually be WORSE than the Omen storyline.
All the elements were there! The “surviving without technology” theme, the “science versus religion” theme… but nothing is done with it, except to give Dawnstar the chance to be truly insufferable. And Brainiac 5, despite being the co-protagonist, is particularly underwhelming.
But let’s talk about Dawnstar, shall we?
We know she’s in love with Wildfire, she’s said so more than once. I don’t have a problem with her falling in love with another guy, and being conflicted because Wildfire doesn’t have a body.
But she falls in love with a guy she can’t even understand, from a culture she doesn’t know, and even after learning that he was initially ready to sacrifice her… she STILL has a thing for him!?
Her initial “I’m better than anyone else” attitude was an interesting character flaw in her first years, but at this point we’re crossed into her holier-than-thou attitude for good.
The worldbuilding is lazy and uninspired, the new characters are unlikeable, the subplots about the planet don’t go anywhere, the Legionnaires are either ineffective or just plain insufferable… and they spent THREE WHOLE ISSUES on this crap!!!