Dazzler #23 (1983)
by Danny Fingeroth & Frank Springer
If this was any other hero, I’d take the cover as symbolic and not immediately think it’s showing the hero about to be defeated.
But it’s Dazzler, so… maybe?
We begin with SUDDEN APARTMENT FIRE!
Dazzler’s half-sister Lois is now in the supporting cast. And thanks to her we learn that Dazzler also used to rap! I just pray we don’t get to see that in a scene… even without sound, I can just hear the cringe.
In order to get help (since the phones aren’t working), Dazzler uses her powers to glow. Her sister spots her, so if she’s not an idiot she’s bound to figure out she has powers.
Well she’s Dazzler’s sister, so it all depends if idiocy is genetic.
Jokes aside, it’s not a bad moment for Dazzler. Her powers aren’t of much use against fire, but she’s still using them to help people.
Okay I’m no expert on fire safety, but… is it really a great idea to linger in the apartment for whatever time it’s going to take to soak the blankets? Aren’t they just increasing the risk of suffocating?
Also, forget what I said about her powers being useless against fire, because apparently lasers can cut flames. (???)
Well what do you know, her sister is NOT an idiot!
A surprisingly somber moment for the series.
Don’t worry, Dazzler, I’m sure your tombstone won’t be that dire.
Dazzler initially suspected this was an attack from the Sisterhood of Evil Mutants after last issue, but they barely have a cameo in this story.
Turns out the fire was caused by a mercenary who goes by the name Flame.
Although I’m pretty sure the actual villain is the landlord.
Dazzler then takes what is possibly the first smart decision of her career: since she’s constantly targeted by supervillains and she CLEARLY doesn’t know how to handle them… she hires Luke Cage and Iron Fist as her body guards!!!
And in case you’re wondering: hiring them would cost 297.99$ dollars a day in 2023 money.
She’s right to be worried, because a fire breaks out almost immediately at her studio… but this time she has two ACTUAL superheroes to help.
Too bad Dazzler’s incompetency is apparently contagious, so the studio goes up in flames.
No, seriously, everyone turns into an idiot in this series.
I’m not exactly Angel’s biggest fan, but even he is not this useless.
Just like when she hired Spider-Woman, Dazzler has contracted an actual superhero (willingly this time!) to close an investigation… and she discovers the solution herself by sheer dumb luck.
Told you the landlord was the villain.
This series really goes out of its way to make Dazzler useless, to the point of adding the otherwise unnecessary detail about Flame being a mechanical genius who can build a completely silent motorcycle. (WTF!?)
Dazzler manages to break free by… just watch this, I don’t think I can describe it.
Dazzler manages to put on her skates, and once again we’re supposed to believe her acrobatics are more impressive than her being able to shoot lasers.
As you saw on the cover Flame also has a fire sword, so get ready for the lamest lightsaber fight ever.
And that’s it! Luke Cage and Iron Fist show up just in time to do nothing.
Soooo… Flame was a complete waste of a character. Let’s hope the next villain is an improvement.
The only subplot we get is Lois getting fainting spells. This will actually be more important than the entire Flame story.
Dazzler significance: 0/10
Silver Age-ness: 0/10
Does it stand the test of time? 0/10
If this wasn’t made by the regular writer and artist I’d swear this was a fill-in: it’s right in the middle of a storyline, doesn’t have anything to do with it, and it’s the epitome of boring and generic.
Obligatory underwear shot: 32
Also, Dazzler’s sister gets in the fanservice action. First her mother, now her: clearly it runs in the family.
