MARVEL TREASURY EDITION #28 (1981)
Writers: Jim Shooter & Marv Wolfman
Penciler: John Romita
We have seen Doctor Doom through the 60s and the 70s.
Before the retrospective can go ahead to the 80s, let’s look at one of the weirdest things Doom did in that decade… fighting Superman!
This is the second Superman and Spider-Man team-up.
While Doctor Doom is not exactly a Spider-Man villain (they met twice at this point), he makes sense if you want a big name for Marvel.
It’s notable that Jim Shooter chose the Parasite as the DC villain, since he created him.
We begin with Spider-Man stopping some bank robbers (armed with laser guns!) during a routine nightly patrol.
And of course once he leaves he’s in trouble with the law, because that’s how Spider-Man rolls.
Hilariously, the reason why the police came to the site to bother Spider-Man was that Doctor Doom called them! The idea of Doom making a phone call is just funny to me.
He also has to make sure that his monologues are being recorded, because who wouldn’t want to hear him drone on and on and on about how awesome he is?
It’s a pity that this is out of continuity because it’s been a while since we’ve had a literal MIRROR SMASH!
Moving back to Spider-Man, we are still in the era where crossovers are handled by just pretending Marvel and DC are part of the same universe. So he’s just sent to Metropolis because the Hulk has been seen there.
The Hulk is not hard to find.
This is the first time we cover the Superman of this era, so in case you don’t know, Clark Kent wasn’t a newspaper reporter in the late 70s and early 80s.
He was a TV news anchor.
This is the occasion to bring back all the journalists linked with Superman; with the exception of Perry White, all the others have worked for the TV network WGBS at one time or another.
The guy on the left is a#hole media mogul Morgan Edge, and the one on the right…
*rage intensifies*
STEVE. LOMBARD.
I HATE THIS GUY WITH THE INTENSITY OF A TRILLION EXPLODING KRYPTONS.
He’s supposed to be comic relief. Except he’s not funny, he’s obnoxious, he’s not funny, he never has anything interesting to say or do, he’s not funny, and most importantly HE’S NOT FUNNY.
And speaking of limitless rage: the Hulk has arrived in Metropolis!
Superman forces the evacuation of the building by CREATING A MINI-EARTHQUAKE WITH HIS FOOT.
And soon HULK SMASH!
I’ve always loved the Hulk nicknames; Superman is “Cape-man”, and the Hulk gets rid of him for a couple of pages by punching him across the river.
Now I know what you’re thinking: is there going to be any Spider-Man in this Spider-Man team-up?
And Superman says “nope!”
To be fair, Superman does this by being AN ABSOLUTE BADASS.
“He does not budge”.
Turns out that the Hulk isn’t going on a rampage for no reason: he was provoked by an insect-sized robot, which Superman promptly crushes.
The Hulk calms down and transforms back into Bruce Banner, with Superman even putting a good word for him.
However, it turns out that this was all a plan to free the Parasite, because Doctor Doom knew exactly where the Hulk would strike!
Without the Hulk and with Superman too far, Parasite has to absorb life energy from Spider-Man (who by now has changed back into Peter Parker).
In a bit of clever writing, this incident is what causes Peter to meet Jimmy Olsen…
…and THAT leads to Peter stumbling into WGBS, where he doesn’t waste any time figuring out that Steve Lombard is human trash.
This is the part of the story where Peter finds out that the life of a journalist is SO much easier in the DC universe.
Well, at least if you’re not interacting with Morgan Edge.
(also: what kind of TV network gives its anchor a contract that says he can leave anytime without notice!?)
I’m not exactly sure WHY he needs to take some time off. The only thing he seems to do, once he figures out that Doom is behind the Hulk’s rampage, is to visit the Latverian Embassy.
Superman expects Doom will be less than forthcoming in admitting his involvement, but Doom is not one to waste any chance for a monologue.
This is easily the most interesting part of the story: Doctor Doom lecturing Superman about his self-professed neutrality.
And I have a really hard time not siding with Doom on this one.
Considering the immense scope of Superman’s pre-Crisis powers, where could almost literally do anything… it’s only because of the suspension of disbelief that we can accept all of the real world still being applicable in a universe where Superman is the way he is.
It’s less of a problem for post-Crisis, where Superman is still pretty much invincible but still has well defined limits on what he can actually do.
But enough about the philosophical implications of SUDDEN KRYPTONITE!
A smugly taunting Doom is the best Doom.
Superman does, however, have a trick up his sleeve: remember that Doom coated the embassy in lead?
His Kryptonian family motto is “Throw it into space!”.
Doctor Doom: not giving a f#k since 1962.
This is the part of the story where Clark finds out that the life of a journalist is SO much easier in the Marvel universe.
Superman’s reasoning for leaving Metropolis is pretty flimsy.
Doom’s remarks seem to have affected him a little.
He also pays a visit to Latveria.
And by the way, Superman’s entire plan of using Clark Kent as bait for Doom?
Completely useless!
There’s no question about who is the big villain in this story.
Back to Spider-Man, apparently years of verbal abuse from J. Jonah Jameson has made their relationship co-dependent.
Also he has no luck with Lana Lang.
JUST GO AWAY, STEVE LOMBARD!
Although I have to admit, it’s kind of refreshing seeing Peter fight back instead of being a doormat like Clark Kent.
Since Spider-Man is feeling down, he decides to clear his mind by going back to the construction site where he caught the bank robbers at the beginning of the story.
And he discovers that there’s a whole secret base beneath it!
Then he runs into Wonder Woman, for the same reason the Hulk showed up: both had TV shows going on at the time.
Doom takes advantage of Spider-Man’s sketchy reputation, so he has to do is order him through the intercom to attack Wonder Woman… and she falls for the trick.
He cleverly defuses the situation by taking out the lights and making it clear that he doesn’t want to fight her.
Unfortunately Doom’s goons return with very powerful guns, and since pre-Crisis Wonder Woman was not anywhere near Superman’s league she’s allowed to lose.
She’s taken away; Doom wants to get rid of her, but Parasite wants to keep her for himself because she’s hot.
Doom is sympathetic towards Parasite’s plight, and he decides to tell him about his big plan.
Doom’s plan is AMAZING.
Step 1: build enormous underground bases beneath all major cities on Earth
Step 2: make them invisible to Superman
Step 3: sabotage all forms of energy production.
ALL OF THEM.
Step 4: sabotage the use of all weapons.
ALL OF THEM.
Step 5: become the only supplier of any kind of energy on Earth!
That’s just… WOW. There are villains who think big, and then there’s Doctor Doom who has like five gigantic plans going on at once!!!
At this point both Superman and Spider-Man have enough clues to locate Doom’s headquarters.
But of course Doom was ready for Superman.
So now Doom has Superman, Spider-Man, Hulk and Wonder-Woman prisoners, and he plans to allow the Parasite to absorb the powers of all four.
Doom has told the Parasite that he wants to use him as an enforcer to crush his enemies, but that’s not the whole story. Absorbing THAT much power will turn the Parasite into a crystal. (???)
You see, Doom’s fusion reactor has a tiny, tiny design flaw: without the Parasite crystal form IT WILL BLOW UP THE PLANET.
Unfortunately for Doom, absorbing Spider-Man’s powers means that the Parasite has Spider-Sense now.
Also: while he’s not as expert as Superman, Spider-Man is no stranger to bulls#it his way out of a tight spot.
A fight with the Parasite breaks out, irreparably damaging the controls: the reactor WILL blow up the planet, and Doom is not going to stay to enjoy the ride!
Just in case you’re wondering how Superman defeats the Parasite, it’s thanks to Doom’s glove.
There’s still the matter about the reactor. Superman goes inside it to try to absorb the explosion, while Spider-Man… basically has no idea of what he’s doing.
But once again, Spider-Sense saves the day!
Meanwhile, Doom’s attempt to leave Earth is not going well.
Only one chance left to avoid capture: reach the Latverian embassy!
ON FOOT because somehow losing a glove means his armor can’t fly anymore. (WTF!?)
Doom’s earlier monologue is kind of proven to be correct when Superman completely drops the ball once he’s on foreign soil.
And that’s about it!
Clark Kent goes back to Metropolis because, without the need to lure out Doom, he has no reason to stay in New York City.
And Peter Parker can’t stay in Metropolis because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Come to think of it, you couldn’t pay me enough to live in the same city of Steve Lombard.
Historical significance: 0/10
This obviously can’t have any impact on the characters. While they will meet again in future crossovers, it’ll be in a different continuity so they won’t remember this story.
Silver Age-ness: 4/10
Obviously both characters are well beyond the Silver Age at this point, but there are still some elements here and there.
Does it stand the test of time? 6/10
This is a tough call. The parts about Doctor Doom and Superman hold up very well! Even the latter, despite being firmly pre-Crisis, feels like a person most of the time.
Spider-Man gets the raw part of the deal. While he’s ultimately the one to save the day, he’s not given much to do… this is definitely more of a Superman story than a Spider-Man story.
The inclusion of the Hulk and Wonder Woman feels tacked on; at least the Hulk gets some great action scenes, while Wondy is completely wasted here.
But by far the worst parts are the Clark Kent and Peter Parker scenes. There’s some potential in showing them in a different environment… except the Daily Planet is shown to be an unrealistically fantastic place where to work, and the Daily Bugle scenes are just boring.
And I generally find the Bugle far, FAR more engaging than the Planet, but this was just meh.